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Reflecting on Michael McGuire’s “Be Confident Not a…
Reflecting on Michael McGuire’s “Be Confident, Not a Know-It-All”, I find myself a changed person over the course of the semester. I am much more confident in my writing, as well as I am with speaking to people. Writing with conviction can run parallel with speaking with conviction. This particular article reinforces phrases that are synonymous with uncertainty, and a lack of confidence with oneself. There is also an overabundance of confidence that has to be checked as well. The problem I have is I never know whether I’m being a decisive or overconfident in any of my writing. Notice I didn’t mention the uncertainty or lack of confidence, because in life, showing those types of traits can be the difference of landing a job or not. Mr. McGuire mentions how for some reason we hedge our writing as a safety net because we’re afraid to go on a limb. This is true with most people, including myself. One of the most positive things in my writing I’ve learned through this class is to write with conviction. It’s rule that follows me outside of class into my everyday life, especially at work. When speaking with conviction people are more willing to listen, when you write with conviction People are more willing to read what you write. On the other hand don’t speak with so much conviction that makes you sound arrogant because that can get you into trouble too. For instance I have an old supervisor. Don’t try to tell me how to do my job. When he had no clue what he was talking about. He would do the same with other employees and we would humor him because he was the boss. Ultimately he never really got our respect because he thought we were dumb and didn’t know any better about our own jobs. And on the last couple sentences are little off the beaten path, but they relate to the title in question.
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Alex Velez
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Alex Velez
Reflecting on Michael McGuire’s “Be Confident Not a…
Reflecting on Michael McGuire’s “Be Confident, Not a Know-It-All”, I find myself a changed person over the course of the semester. I am much more confident in my writing, as well as I am with speaking to people. Writing with conviction can run parallel with speaking with conviction. This particular article reinforces phrases that are synonymous with uncertainty, and a lack of confidence with oneself. There is also an overabundance of confidence that has to be checked as well. The problem I have is I never know whether I’m being a decisive or overconfident in any of my writing. Notice I didn’t mention the uncertainty or lack of confidence, because in life, showing those types of traits can be the difference of landing a job or not. Mr. McGuire mentions how for some reason we hedge our writing as a safety net because we’re afraid to go on a limb. This is true with most people, including myself. One of the most positive things in my writing I’ve learned through this class is to write with conviction. It’s rule that follows me outside of class into my everyday life, especially at work. When speaking with conviction people are more willing to listen, when you write with conviction People are more willing to read what you write. On the other hand don’t speak with so much conviction that makes you sound arrogant because that can get you into trouble too. For instance I have an old supervisor. Don’t try to tell me how to do my job. When he had no clue what he was talking about. He would do the same with other employees and we would humor him because he was the boss. Ultimately he never really got our respect because he thought we were dumb and didn’t know any better about our own jobs. And on the last couple sentences are little off the beaten path, but they relate to the title in question.
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Alex Velez
Little Red Schoolhouse A Really big Deal Getting…
Little Red Schoolhouse, A Really big Deal
Getting started
Prof. McGuire was trying to take advantage of the steam from our last portfolio piece by jumping right into our “group service learning project”. Coming in the class one day, I was completely caught off guard when Prof. McGuire asked the class if they knew what speed dating was. Some classmates were familiar with the idea but didn’t know where he was going with this concept. He then handed out team player inventory worksheet and we took 5 min. to fill out. Once it was filled out. He then told us we would have 60 seconds to basically sell ourselves in an interview with classmates to form our own group. I thought that this was an interesting concept and was skeptical to say the least. This is one of the most interesting, and awesome exercises I’ve ever partaken in. This is hands-down the best way. Instructors can get students to pick who they want to work within a group. Also, I learned a lot about myself and my classmates, more specifically, I learned that me my classmates are not that different. Once we needed to pick our group, We only had 10 min. of class to do it. It was extremely difficult for me to pick who I wanted to group with everybody seem to have something worthwhile to bring to the team. Ultimately team “Gryffindor” consisting of myself, Alex, Shaun, and Jenna was formed. Ya, “Gryffindor” was Jenna’s Idea, we honestly drew blanks when thinking of a name that would rival hers.
choosing a topic and finding time
Our next challenge was to choose a topic for group service learning project. Although difficult. It really didn’t take that much time to figure out what we want to do. Jenna suggested we do something with the animal welfare league, which I thought was kind of a cool idea. Shaun thought we should go with the little red schoolhouse. I thought little red schoolhouse would be more up alley, since it dealt a little bit more with the human aspect. I remember we were so proactive about getting our project started after we found our topic in the middle class, I decided to call little red schoolhouse to schedule our appointment. I immediately got Julie Vandervort, the director a little red schoolhouse on the line. She was extremely excited to have a potential for some volunteers to come in and do some work. Our group’s biggest problem was finding time to do our interview with Julie. It seemed as if our schedules would always be conflicting so me and shaun decided to go ahead and take the interview with Julie that Friday. Although we were proactive in getting a meeting scheduled immediately finding time for a follow-up and for volunteer work would be a challenge later.
Meeting for the first time
Friday’s meeting would be interesting since I’ve never been to the little red schoolhouse. I’ve only heard of the little red schoolhouse through my sister who took her kids to their 10 years ago when they’re very young. When I got to little red schoolhouse to meet Shaun, I was pleasantly surprised to see all the activity that was going on. Does one o’clock in the afternoon and there were kids all over the place. Me and Shaun entered the new visitor center which was built recently in 2010. When we enter the building you feel the energy of all the children playing. We walked up to the reception desk and asked for Julie. We identify ourselves and they were expecting us. When Julie came out to greet me and Shaun she was extremely accommodating. We went into her office and started talking about the little red schoolhouse and the new facility that was built in 2010. We then started talking about the horse preserve district of Cook County, and how could County set aside 68,000 acres for conservation and forestry. The 68,000 acres is called the green belt and lies on the western outskirts of Cook County mainly. Julie was an extremely passionate and energetic person. I couldn’t think of a better person to be director of the Lord schoolhouse. They seem to be very independent. Most of the maintenance in and around the schoolhouse is done by the faculty that works there. Even the visitors facility seems to try the be self sufficient in itself. The building in question is “green”, it is heated by geothermal means, and is very energy-efficient when it comes to climate control. The building is state-of-the-art and rivals other educational centers. . During my interview with Julie I finally asked her why? Why is conservation so important to people? She then described to me how we all have a connection with nature and how we feel peace when we are one with nature. She had mentioned how the Greenville was established so people from the city can, and find serenity and basically recharge your batteries to come back and engage in the hustle bustle of work again. I could not agree with Julie more. She decided to start talking about what we would do for volunteer work which range from making displays for the actual little red schoolhouse that needed to be updated, to Prairie restoration. It wouldn’t be until a series of e-mails before we came up with a decision to do Prairie restoration for Julie. This particular center surprised me by showcasing indigenous animals to the area as well as educational activities to entertain children. As I took a tour the facility there was a lot of information to process about our area. First and foremost the animals indigenous to the area that ranges from snakes and turtles to frogs, and owls. There is also a pathway of information leading down to the aquarium center. As you start the top of the ramp it begins with the history of our area millions of years ago coming up to current day when you reach bottom.Prairie restoration
Again, trying to find time to do the volunteer work was a big challenge for our team. This is probably one of the biggest hurdles for people and why they don’t volunteer in the first place. Most people say they would like to do more volunteer work unfortunately may have time constraints with doing so. Our team is no exception to the rule, but we persevered to make time for this project. Our team ended up splitting up in two groups. Me and Shaun would go on different days, then Jenna and Alex. Shaun and I arrived at the nature center at 10 AM on Saturday, April 14. We are told to meet up with John O’Neill was a hands-on naturalist and would be the person we would work for that day. It had rained earlier that day and the night prior, so I was sure to bring my camping shoes and since I didn’t know what type of tall grass we’d be working in, I wore a hoodie as well. Our task that day was to read the Prairie adjacent to the parking lot of the nature center of invasive species to the prairie plants. I jumped right into my volunteer mode and volunteered Shaun to cut away the invasives with shears while John applied a herbicide to the freshly cut stems which would prevent said invasive to grow back. We got a lot of work done that they and for the groups that follow I will revisit when the volunteer work is done to see exactly what type of progress we made in the Prairie. I did take some before photos to gauge such progress.
Reflection
We take a lot of things for granted and for me to go behind the scenes and see exactly what our forces are people do is a humbling experience. I wish other people can have the same experience as myself, so they can see exactly where their money is going. The forest preserve provides great services for us to enjoy the outdoors. Little things like Prairie restoration are environments that get overlooked all the time. So the next time you’re out in the forest and enjoying nature and you see a Prairie being towered over by old trees, just remember that somebody put that Prairie there for you to enjoy. -
Alex Velez
After reading the cycle of socialization, I agreed with most of the authors ideas and claims. In the beginning of the article he suggests that we begin our systematic training on how to be from when we are born, and we get trained on how we should be. He also explains how being born into a certain social group can extremely influence the outcome of what your beliefs would end up to be in one’s life. I also agree that “adults raise us to help shape our self concepts and self perceptions. They teach us rules behavior at an early age and we conform to their ideas. “This can be good or bad, as well, depending on what their views are.” I guess good or bad depends on what your views are not the authors. I especially like how nonconformists are “trouble makers”. These days if you go against the grain in some respects you get rewarded for being different, cool, and a rebel. Another point that really hit home for me in the article is that at the core of the cycle are Negative elements like myths and stereotypes feed into the cycle’s repeatability. I believe there are good people in the target group however, I believe the target groups tend to believe their agents myths and stereotypes placed on them throughout time. This I think is the root of core issues and needs to be addressed if the cycle is to be broken. “Self Fulfilling Prophecy: A Self Fulfilling Prophecy is a prediction that causes itself to come true due to the simple fact that the prediction was made. This happens because our beliefs influence our actions.” Ok, all of the websites I we went too for this definition were similar, so don’t kill me for citing Wikipedia on this one.
Harro, Bobbie. The cycle of socialization, 15-21 Splatter.writing101.net: The Messy Art of Writing.Web 4 arpil.2012 -
Alex Velez
Since I shared the same experience the Saturday after, I could make some comparisons to your experience. I think it’s pretty cool that you have some volunteering under your belt at a nursing home. I agree with you that share your soles has done a lot as an organization for those less fortunate than us that can’t afford shoes. We also saw the videos that you did and they were pretty powerful in getting the share your soles message and story across. I think it was especially cool that you got to talk to mona to get to know her a little bit to be a down to earth person. This is pretty cool because how often do you get to actually meet the person behind all of this work? One figure you obtained but we didn’t was the amount of money it took to ship the shoes. I realize now how much money it takes for this process to actually be successful. To be the camera woman must have been pretty interesting. I would of liked to know what kind of questions you asked other people who where there. I must admit that after an hour of volunteering myself I felt like I didn’t get much done but after we got busy time flew and I would have liked to have stayed longer but I had other things to do. I would have liked a little more organization during my visit. Either way it was still a fulfilling experience so I can agree with you there. Giving something back in general can be extremely fulfilling for oneself. I also share you disappointment upon hearing about people who left early, its only 3 hours of your life. I also had fun with the people I was paired up with and really got to know them a little better as well. Mona has done so much for people that would be without shoes had she not stepped up to do something about it. I worry about what can be done so Mona wouldn’t have to send shoes anymore? I touch on this subject in my reflection and wonder how places like this get so poverish in the first place? What can be done to change it in the future? I like your paper, but I would like to see more figures in it such as the number of shoes sent since share your soles was started. I would like to know when and how share your soles was started. Facts and statistics would be a good way to put things in perspective and give your reader some depth as to how serious the situation is. I personally went online and viewed the video we saw at share your soles to get some content for my paper. When you go back to revise this paper it might prove to be helpful in this respect.
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Alex Velez
Looking Back at Yourself
After working till midnight the night before and the end of a 57 hour work week, I have a right to feel a little cheated to do this service requirement for professor McGuire. As I pull up at 9:45 at first glance it seems as if my peers may have the same mindset as myself. As I look through the crowd of zombies waiting to enter the building I see some zombies I recognize from class. I say “what’s up” to Alex and Corey and we exchange pleasantries as the doors open to let the crowd of zombies in as if there were a smorgasbord of “brains” to be had. As I walk through the building I notice a lot of shoes kind of organized for a sale of some sort and oddly enough, a make shift hut to my left. The hut looks like it was made from landfill garbage and some abandoned wooden skids. We briskly walk past the scene through the dark since we where what seems like the first group in as the lights haven’t been turned on yet. We reach our 1st destination where are chairs are lined in rows where we sit to watch a presentation on a flat screen TV. It seems as if our temporary coordinator didn’t have his coffee either as he slips in the first of two DVD’s which are explanations on why we are here. The opening of the DVD asks a very profound question “what if you can change the world for someone? Would you?”The DVD was nicely organized in explaining how share your soles was discovered by Mona Purdy. Mona Purdy has been active in getting children shoes for over nine years. She served over 1.5 million shoes in that time which is a pretty awesome feat in itself.
We were corralled into a short walkway leading to a huge warehouse. Initially there were boxes upon boxes crowding over each other, and judging by the signs on the side of the boxes appeared to be filled with shoes. After reaching the end of the rows of boxes, the warehouse then opened up into an almost vacant floor. It was a little cold at the time being warehouse and all. The facilitators that morning gave us a brief description of what they needed done and basically cut us loose. I found myself following Professor McGuire along with Corey and Alex over to sign detail. Our objective was to set up signage indicating where specific styles of shoes should go. It was kind of hard to get the ball rolling, since we had so many options and signs Choose from. After tearing some signs up and issuing them to some static lanes we found ourselves quickly out of work. All of a sudden an older man appeared out of nowhere and starts handing out directions as to what we should be doing. He obviously has done this before so we followed up and started to put shoes in lanes. All right, now we have some actual work to do but it was still difficult trying to figure out which shoes went to which lane. I even asked two girls what the difference was between “heels”, and “flats”. They couldn’t quite explain it but they both agreed on which was which when I presented each shoe in question to them. They would answer overwhelmingly as to which on was which but they still had a hard time explaining the difference to me. By the time one o’clock rolled around I had to leave, Overall it was a good experience. I think my time would’ve been better utilized if it was a bit more organized. On the other hand I had a great time getting to know Corey and Alex. I mean, we really figured out a lot of Corey’s anger issues and his phobia of shoes.I learned a lot about myself through this experience. I learned that I do take things for granted, something as trivial shoes. Shoes may be trivial for me, but not for one of the millions of people who are grateful to have such a basic thing. I can show empathy for those who have to struggle everyday to get something as basic as shoes, but what can we do to put an end to it? Also, it makes you wonder how people got by without Mona’s shoes all this time. Don’t get me wrong if the shoes would be going to a landfill rather than to someone who can use them, it would be a waste. I would volunteer again but to be honest I wouldn’t know why. All I know is that it makes me feel good to do it and I try not to think about the big picture because sometimes the big picture puts a hopeless spin on things. See, by that I mean I can’t solve the problem for why these people don’t have shoes in the first place. In most of the cases presented we have different governments, different ideals, and different ways of life. I drive a car to work, and to school, some of these people ride mules to get water, and I walk to the faucet. My point being that it’s not my place to tell these people how to live their lives. I may be getting side tracked here but I guess I feel as if with most of these charity groups, aren’t we just enabling these people in need? Case in point, I gave a guy outside a Walgreens in Blue Island a $15 gift card for dunkin doughnuts. They had other gift cards but I wanted to make it as difficult as possible for this guy to buy a six pack of beer with any other gift card. He was grateful for it but I took his gratitude for what it was worth and thought, Mr. McGuire would be proud. About a week ago my sister followed suit and gave a guy the exact same thing, a $15 gift card for dunkin and she returned to the same Walgreens that same night and wouldn’t you know it, the same guy figured out a way to get a 6 pack of beer. She couldn’t believe it but reality soon kicked in for her as she, like myself, are products of the city (meaning we’ve seen it all). This kind of deters me but I hear good stories as well. A friend/coworker of mine told me how he helped a woman who was standing outside of a food for less in Bolingbrook begging for some money. Right away I had to fill in the blanks in his story but every blank was wrong. He took the woman inside the store (because he’s a little better at reading people than I am) because he saw the desperation in her eyes as people would walk by and swear at her as she begged for change. He then bought her milk, eggs, etc… and then gave her a ride home. My friend is a saint for doing this but how do you prevent something like this from happening in the first place?
I will continue to do more community service because it makes me feel good and if it’s the most I can do for the moment, then I’ll have to settle for it. I lived in the south east side of Chicago and due to some uncontrollable circumstances in my youth I opted to move with my older brother to the North West suburbs. I am thankful for it because there is no telling what would have happened to me if I stayed in that environment. The reason why I bring this up is because we are products of our environments, and I feel if I stayed in the city I would have not tried to better myself. I absolutely loved the burbs when I moved there and decided “this is definitely for me” and wanted to stay. What if we did the same for those out there who wanted to better/Americanize themselves? I know parents who have adopted children from South America and I look at these kids in awe! So outgoing, so bright, so out spoken, and I look to the mother of the child and ask her what if you never adopted her? She responds back with “I know, its nuts right?” I guess I’m kind of exploring some solutions through my writing. If we took an exchange student in from some of these countries and show them how the other half lives. Then maybe they would go back and change things themselves, or not, but at least you made a more conscious effort to make a difference via activism instead of just doing a service.-
Lee McKinnis
>>the same guy figured out a way to get a 6 pack of beer. She couldn’t believe it but reality soon kicked in for her as she, like myself, are products of the city
For all you know the dude blatantly asked people to guy a pack of beer for him. Its not unheard of.
Also lol, where did you grow up in chicago. Hegewisch? Actually you don’t know wha you’d be like if you still lived in Chicago, lol I don’t know how I’d be if I still lived in my old chicago neighborhood (98/cottage grove – rosemoor/roseland). Then again I prolly wouldn’t be too different, maybe. I dunno. Hmmm.
Also
>>What if we did the same for those out there who wanted to better/Americanize themselves?
There’s a bit of a difference between “becoming better” and “americanizing them” xD
There are exchange/conversation programs – look u p the ones where you can be a host family. I remember my father joking that the host programs prolly wouldn’t accept him as host family due to living in the ghetto xD
Aso, suburbs sucks! Have to drive everywhere~!
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Corey Gallai
Thanks for mentioning me!!!
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Taylor Blattner
You have a very interesting way of writing, but i like it! I was able to relate very well to it, because i also attended the share your soles community service opportunity. I like how you did not go into great detail of what you did through out the day, and how you focused mainly on your thought about community service. I feel like you are one hundred percent dedicated and willing to help out when people need your help. You showed very strong beliefs on why and how you support community service so much. Just that right there shows that you are a good role model for younger kids, that you can set good examples for them. Now and in the future. I like how you were honest throughout the paper about your opinions on the share your soles community service opportunity. For example, when you said that you would volunteer again, but that you did not know why would would do it again. Being honest is always a good thing and in my opinion it makes or breaks papers. It makes them more interesting to read for the reader, like myself. It also makes them easier to relate to. I felt the same way about being there. Yes we were helping out a country that is in desperate need of shoes by packing thousands pairs of shoes, but are we really fixing the problem? Or just simply fixing it temporarily for the moment. That is a question that i kept asking myself through out the day. I really like the direction that chose to go with on your paper. You did not follow the basic “diary format” as some people would call it, but you basically talked about your experience and feelings that you had towards this wonderful opportunity that we were faced with. One of my favorite things that you talked about in this paper, is the personal story about the man at the Walgreens in Blue Island, and the six pack of beer. To me, adding in personal stories make it more interesting for me to read and easier to get the reading done with. It also gives me something to talk to you about while writing this peer review. The personal story, even though it was short and a little off topic like you stated, was in my opinion the best part of the whole paper. It tied everything together for a great ending to a great paper. If you want to experience more community service, I live in Oak Lawn, and i hear about service opportunities everywhere, posted on street polls on the radio, absolutely everywhere. So just take the time and find the right one that you are willing to participate in. And make sure that you get some people to help you to make it more fun and interesting, and i am sure that it will make the time go by faster. But overall, i really loved you paper. I was able to tell that you are passionate and loved the opportunity that you were involved in.
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Tom Rybovic
I really enjoyed reading about your experience and the way you look at services such as Share Your Soles. The whole time I was reading this I kept thinking back and comparing it to what I thought of the situation on that service day. I really enjoyed reading this because I did the same volunteering on the same day as you did. It is interesting about how you talked about the way they had everything set up. It is a no brainer that the organization could have been managed a little better. Considering it being a no profit organization, they are doing a pretty good job. i felt the same way as you did when you first got there. I was tired and had way too many other things on my mind to worry about. I also closely related to you about how my time was spent there. I felt like my presence there could have been used much more efficiently. At times I felt like I was just there because I had to be. I felt like I wasn’t even helping t times because I was simply sweeping the floor. One time the lady told me to move a bunch of boxes to one area and before I even finished she changed her mind and made me move them all back. All I could think after that is that this was not helping children with shoes. I tried not thinking of the bigger image like you mentioned but it was really hard. I understood that everyone has to contribute a little bit to accomplish something bigger and better but it was hard to think that way. Yeah we were helping out the organization by participation and doing little stuff for them to help them out but it definitely did not feel like we were helping people in need. The thing that I found very interesting in your paper was when you talked about activism. “Then maybe they would go back and change things themselves, or not, but at least you made a more conscious effort to make a difference via activism instead of just doing a service.” That sentence right there ended the paper off very strong in my opinion. It is great that you look at it in that way and that something else can actually be done other than service opportunities. This shows that you have a unique way of thinking which I really admire.
I really liked the personal story you also included into your paper. It was somewhat off topic but in one way or another it fit in just right. It talked about how did some good and eventually you are the one that saw it turn back on you. There is definitely a chance that the guy could have bought the beer with someone elses money or s someone already mentioned someone could have bought it for him. Either way I think it was a great addition to your paper as personal stories always add interest to the story plot. -
Holman Zea
Hi Alex, I like the lay back style of your writing It is easy to follow and it seems that your give me your side of the story. Not like other that will give long definitions or give the background of the organization. Your essay is pretty straightforward. I see some zombies, really nice way to describe people in the morning. From reading three different essays about Share your soles it seems this place is pretty big and has tons of shoes. Your essay has a lot of humor in it. Who in the world would have shoe phobia? O wait Corey does! Beware of the shoes attacking people with their sticky smell! I could imagine you had a lot of fun volunteering. I could also picture the old man looking at you thinking “this new people are always messing things up, I am going over there and tell them how this is done.” No matter what views one has about volunteering at the end the goal is to actually learn about oneself and to have that experience. I like how you were honest throughout the essay about your opinions on your service opportunity. For example, when you said that you would volunteer again, but that you did not know why would do it again. I like your personal story about the about the guy at Walgreens getting his 6 pack of beer instead of using your gift card. A lot of this people are already addictive and their really depress. People find their solution through drugs and alcohol to relieve their pain. It may not be the best way but it is the cheapest way. Overall your paper was good and has a lot of personal involvement. Your style of writing is straightforward and interesting. I actually read it all and did not skip any parts. You gave a personal story that shows that we think we are doing a good deed but we don’t know if it actually is. You thought you did good giving that guy a gift card for a warm coffee and he ends up with a cold beer.
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Alex Velez
The main idea is a little unclear in chapter 7 of “Why White Rice”. Oh wait, Troy Swanson says “don’t steal other people’s ideas” twice, and in an effort to change it up so he wouldn’t sound redundant, he says “don’t not steal ideas from other people” 4 times in the same chapter. Troy seems pretty serious about plagiarism and if I seem a little sarcastic it’s because I’m at Huck Finns restaurant writing this week’s journal entry. With empty creamers literally spilling onto the floor from the 4 cups coffee I’ve had, while working on my fifth. I just wanted to go to bed after another 12 hour night shift but I can’t put this book down. I found section 7.2 “Different Reasons For Citing Sources” to be very helpful as a useful cut and dry guideline for future writing. • “Communicating information to the reader” translates as a chain of credible knowledge and information which is passed from reader to reader. • “Back up the things you think you know” so far our writing is based off of what we want to write about which opens some doors. We may find things that may change your ideas or preconceived notions you may have had. • “Response to another author” I really like this one but have never entertained the idea of challenging an author. I may have to look into this one a little more closely. In section 7.3 “The Grace of Using Sources”, Troy talks about people “not accurately representing sources. This means that we do not simply pull one line out of a source that does not represent the author’s true intent.” I’m going to just sum of Troy’s quote as “selective sourcing”. It’s almost like how you can manipulate a survey by moving some numbers around, or surveying a certain demographic to get the result you want. Although I really like the chapter on citing sources, I still have a hard time knowing where to cite in my writing and how. I feel like I should have more in text citations can someone help me out with this? On my 6th cup of coffee and the battery on my laptop is running on fumes so that’s my queue to “wrap it up”.
Swanson,Troy. “Mash It Up…Gracefully Using Sources.”Why White Rice? Thinking Through Writing. Dubuque:Kendall Hunt.2010.163-173.Print. -
Alex Velez
Stop the Zebras!
Mr. hayner
We can all do our part to stop the spread of zebra mussels in our inland lakes and waterways. Anglers are the main means of transportation of these invasive species by transporting them via bait buckets, boat live wells, and other equipment that may have come in contact with infested waters. Anglers, know your water and educate other anglers about the potential spread of the zebra mussels and what they can do to prevent it from happening. Fisheries biologist of the Dupage County Forest preserve Don Labrose has this advice, “If you use the bait bucket on one body of water, DO NOT TRANSPORT THAT BAIT AND WATER TO ANOTHER BODY OF WATER. Dispose of the bait and water on site, clean the bait bucket and pick up fresh bait and water on the way to another fishing site. It can get expensive, but in the long run it will protect that lake from being infected with zebra mussels.” Do your part to protect what little resources we have to share and enjoy within the city limits.
Sincerely, Alex Velez-
Tom Rybovic
What is something that one can do to help kill off these invasive species? I understand that you are letting people know of the issue and trying to prevent it from spreading. Those are all good reasons that you wrote about on how to stop the spreading of these zebra mussels. Even if we completely stopped the spreading of zebra mussels from lake to lake, what is it that we can do to get rid of these mussels? Won’t they just keep reproducing? If we completely control fisherman and their bait buckets and stop the spreading what will happen to the already infected ponds and lakes? The issue itself is zebra mussels. What do they do to the lake that is so bad? I think you need to talk about why and or how they are bad for the lakes and ponds environment. What is it they physically or chemically do that we do not want them in our fishing water?
I think it would be very beneficial if you talked more about why we need them to stop from taking over more bodies of water. The question still hangs of why we must get rid of them. I understand that they in one way or another are bad for the waters ecosystem, but how? I think it this would catch more attention from anyone that is reading this article if it stated what the mussels are actually doing.
I feel like you also needed to include what a person that does not fish can do. What a regular person that is interested in these zebra mussels can do. It is obvious from the writing that bait buckets are the main reason of these species being spread to different pond but the question is what can we do? Other than cleaning your fishing supplies, what are other things that can be done to prevent these species from taking over our local ponds? We tend to want to see a written explanation of what we can do to help. Well a person that does not fish will easily be turned off by this article. They think they do not a part in this issue therefore they cannot do anything about it. I don’t know if there is anything a non- fisher man can do but if there is then you should definitely include it.
Is the spreading of the zebra mussels the only thing we have to worry about? Are they causing harm to the ponds and lakes that are already manifested? It seems like the mussels would eventually somehow harm the fish that occupy the lake but I cannot tell. It would help if you also described the whole process of them reproducing and their life span. Just to get a better understanding of the mussels it would be great to know how big in size they can get and what kind of damage it is capable of doing. -
Lee McKinnis
Well, the letter is short and to the point. There is nothing else I can notice or comment about, nothing “glares out” at me./
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Holman Zea
I agree with Tom, what harm does Zebras cause to the environment besides attaching themselves to boats and damaging. I read your previous writing that talk more about the issue. But remember the editor does not know the same information that you know. You should include an important fact about zebras and their damage to our lakes. for example, “They have also been proved to clog up water intakes of power plants, steel mills and our own water supply because the mussel is unlike any other fresh water mussel where it has a glue in manufactures that’s like an organic cement that clings on to anything it can, as you can see above with great vigor. Removing the mussels from intake pipes costs millions of dollars which get passed down to the consumer.” Now know this I would be concern because is affecting my pocket and is damaging something that I care about. Does the zebra affect the balance of the environment since they are an invasive species? There are many questions to the issue. What has the Dupage done regarding this issue? The letter sound more emotional rather than persuasive or informal. You should include some facts and connection to others. What newspaper did you wrote? Did the fisheries biologist have something to say about the issue and how it is affecting. In the last part you mention protecting the little resources we have to share. Which ones are those? What can we do about it. Be more informative, persuasive and add some emotion and the letter would be great.
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Alex Velez
Breaking old habits can be a liberating experience! In chapter 2.1, Michael McGuire, I’m sorry, “Professor McGuire” addresses the issue of conformity in learning from grades k-12. He explains how we are from an early age, programmed to carry out certain conditioned responses such as “raising your hand before speaking”, “measuring success by high grades more than by learning”, and “learning beginning and ending with the ring of a bell” just to name a few. I have to agree that this type of systematic learning hinders creative thought and makes learning a chore for most of us. I was the student in grades k-8 that just wanted it to be over with and thinking back on it, I think teachers might have thought the same way. This was my experience learning at a Chicago public school on the south east side and with that mentality, I drifted though life thinking I was a “c” student in school and in life. Professor McGuire also mentions an essay he read by Alfie Kohn’s “The Costs of overemphasizing Achievement.” He also proclaims “This is a great essay that makes a compelling argument for how too much focus on grades coming through school has some real counterproductive effects on student learning.” There are five products listed that give a brief description of such “counterproductive effects.” 1. Students come to regard learning as a chore. 2. Students try to avoid challenging tasks. 3. Students tend to think less deeply. 4. Students may fall apart when they fail. 5. Students value ability more than effort. These effects have followed me throughout my academic career as well as in life. They have been very hard to break for myself but this portion of the chapter makes me realize a little bit about myself and how I can address these issues so I can overcome them. When reading this there is one quote that comes to mind from the Simpsons. Homer tells Bart “remember son, anything you can do someone else will always do better.” And Bart Simpsons response was “got it, can’t win don’t try”. This is one more habit of thinking I will have to break, I will have to trust my instincts a little more when it comes to writing.
McGuire,Michael. “Risky business Indeed: Writing Outside Your Comfort Zone.”Why White Rice? Thinking Through Writing. Dubuque:Kendall Hunt.2010.26-34.Print. -
Alex Velez
In “why white rice?”, Chapter 5 can prove to be useful in writing our “service/activists guide to an issue” in many respects. My paper will draw a lot of useful information from this chapter regarding productivity and relative research to my topic for discussion. The chapter basically gives instruction on cutting through all the red tape to keep on task with the subject matter. I have gotten a lot of ideas on acquiring facts, testimonials, and above all direction when trying to get the best credible sources for my papers in the future. I plan on doing an interview in the future on my paper and I know firsthand how they can be a handful. Interviewing should come a little easier in this case since I have done a lot of research on my subject which simultaneously equips me with more relevant question to ask so I can get some more body. Unfortunately, the hardest part is going to be the research of hard facts, graphs, and measurables. Using the library database was helpful but a lot of the articles I found were out of date, and had graphs I just didn’t know how to read. However, Going to government websites like usgs.gov proved to be very helpful in getting started on my topic. I originally found most of my websites for research by good old google. As I know the book has its hang-ups about it I like it for when I’m having a hard time in getting the ball rolling.
Swanson, Troy.”Dry Your Hair and Don’t Lick the Frozen Flag Pole.”Why White Rice? Thinking Through Writing.Dubuque:Kendall Hunt.2010.101-131.Print. -
Alex Velez
Talking points
What is it: zebra mussels are small mussels with dark striations across their shells which is how they got their name.
History: the zebra mussel was introduced to the great lakes in 1988 by ballast water dumping by large ocean-going vessels from Europe.
Why they are a problem: the invasive mollusk causes a wide variety of problems due to their unique knack to attach themselves to hard surfaces in a high volume of numbers. This coupled with their ability to basically travel by current throughout a body of water makes them a nuisance to power plant water intakes, steel mills, and other water using facilities. They also can effect ecosystems on a micro level. I have seen firsthand, since they are filter feeders their sheer numbers can change clarity in a body of water in months depending on the size of lake, and concentration of the species.
Local issues and current situation:
• The zebra mussel has made it to some local forest preserves with a potential of inhabiting all local bodies of water if not stopped.
• As mentioned the zebra mussel is attracted to hard surfaces but is also known to attach itself to lake vegetation, as well as wildlife such as crayfish, other mussels.
• Fishing opportunities locally may be limited due to infestations, fisheries biologist for dupage county fisheries biologist Don Labros, “Some extreme measures would be to ban boating on all District lakes.”
• another side effect to the mussels is more pollution from shore fisherman. the sharpness of the shell edges make quick work of fishing line and since the mussel is concentrated to hard surfaces close to shore, this produces more fishing line in the water which would under normal circumstances would not be there in the first place.
Suggestions for service: the dupage county forest preserve has set up monitoring systems in their lakes to detect the spread of mussels. I would like to volunteer in surveying these systems, as well as informing the public on the issue as well. I would like to propose a couple of plans to the fisheries biologists locally to help stop the spread of zebra mussels due to the possibility of over running lakes natural mussels indigenous to the area.
Plans include
• A station on site in unaffected areas to check live wells if applicable for boats, and bait buckets for shore fisherman who intend on fishing the body of water before entering and leaving.
• Also, for areas that are already consumed by the mussels introduce a plan for eradication of the species either by molluscicides, lake drainage, or more of a realistic remedy which I just currently learned about electro shocking.
United States, Southeast Ecological Science Center. Frequently Asked Questions About Zebra Mussels. United States Geological Survey, Web. 22 Feb.2012
Maxfish86, “Finding Zebra Mussels.” Fishthenation.com,8 jun. 2009. Web. 22 Feb. 2012. -
Alex Velez
Stop the Zebras Fishing is one of the…
Stop the Zebras!!
Fishing is one of the most relaxing ways to connect and appreciate nature. I fish locally throughout the Chicago land area, whenever the opportunity presents itself. I must admit that I’m partial to fishing the Western suburbs, more specifically forest preserve district of DuPage County. I like fishing the area so much that I have volunteered on occasion for the dupage forest preserve when any projects regarding the lakes came up. For the most part, the projects concerned of mainly services for the community, in trying to bring the outdoors and people together. I consider myself to be a passionate outdoorsman and environmentalist due to the fact that I am an angler. The forest preserve district has been on high alert over the years regarding invasive species which if introduced to these fragile ecosystems would have an adverse affect on the environment. I write a fishing blog for fishthenation.com so I’m out and about on a regular basis reviewing new techniques and writing about them. During the early spring of 2009 while on assignment, I was exploring a fishing technique witch specifically targeted fish which were suspended in the lower water column, when I hooked into something that looked unsettling. It was a mussel that was about 1” in length and had dark striations across it which resembled obviously looked like what I would think to be the zebra mussel which has been infesting the waters of Lake Michigan. About a thumbnail in size in a lake so deep and vast I figured I could play the lottery at that point because of the improbability of hooking into something that small. So I put my line in the water again and coincidentally enough I hooked into another and realized there is something a little odd about this. I ended up contacting Dupage county fisheries biologist Don Labrose, and asked him if he would shed some light on the subject. He said he would gladly examine the specimen in question if I could bring it in. later, I would be proactive in proving the zebra mussels had in fact made it inland to our small lakes. Wouldn’t you know it, I wouldn’t hook into another one until a week later and by that time I had done my own research and discovered that the critter in question was in fact a zebra mussel. I finally got a specimen and delivered it to the forest preserve district headquarters in Wheaton. Shortly thereafter, signage was posted confirming the lake was infested and banned watercraft from launching into the lake to prevent the spread of mussels to other lakes.
twig consumed by zebra mussels at deep quarry lake in Dupage county.The zebra mussel (Dreissena polymorpha) is an invasive species that was transported to the great lakes by the ballasts of commercial tankers from Europe roughly in the late 1980’s. Now, it’s invading our inland waters and has closed fishing opportunities for some of the public due to its potential to spread to other lakes. Some people may see them as a blessing because they are filter feeders, they can clear up water in a lake that was once murky, but they are so good at it they change things from a microscopic level on the food chain by filtering out all the algae which would normally be food for the native microscopic organisms says the united states geological survey. The zebra mussel can siphon up to a liter of water a day. They have also been proved to clog up water intakes of power plants, steel mills and our own water supply because the mussel is unlike any other fresh water mussel where it has a glue in manufactures that’s like an organic cement that clings on to anything it can, as you can see above with great vigor. Removing the mussels from intake pipes costs millions of dollars which get passed down to the consumer. I have seen the zebra mussel attach themselves to submergent vegetation, but they are also know to attach to other native mussels and crayfish as well. The mussels have very sharp edges which cut fishing line from local anglers and produce more pollution which wouldn’t normally be present. I personally have stopped fishing the lake above due to the frustration of getting line cut from the mussels. The zebra mussel in the lake in question above appeared to manifest over night. This is because there reproduction cycle is so fast and efficient it ensures their survival just by sheer numbers. A female zebra mussel can lay up to 1million eggs during a spawning season and produces the lavea form of the mussel called “veligers” when fertilized. veligers are free swimming (http://www.dnr.state.wi.us/org/caer/ce/eek/critter/invert/zebramussel.htm) and when combined with the free movement of current, can be pushed far distances throughout a water system. This was apparent to me when in the same season of fishing I found evidence of the spread of the mussel on the other side of the lake in as little time as a month. This is a 45 acre lake about 45ft deep at its maximum depth. Once they land in an area they are literally stuck there but continue to lay their eggs and the process repeats. These hardy creatures have a reputation for living out of water for long periods of time. Boats, and bait buckets seem to be the transportation of preference for these little guys to travel from lake to lake out of water. This is how fisheries biologists Don Labrose thinks they came to deep quarry lake in Bartlett Illinois.
The current situation in the forest preserves is surprisingly stable. There are chemicals to insure eradication fo the species but it’s very costly, there are predators out there that will control the population but these species of fish themselves aren’t native to the area and would bring more problems to the area as far as invasive species go. Right now education to the public is the best deturent for the time being, and don labrose has put up signage educating the public on what they can do to deter the zebra mussel explosion and to stop them from getting into other lakes. One of the lakes which allowed boats on it was closed down due to the issue. There are monitoring systems in place to detect infiltration of these mussels in any other lakes. I don’t think this is enough. I will suggest since the biggest threat to these lakes are boats and bait buckets I would like to envoke a program which will make sure these buckets and livewells that the mussels are typically transported be inspected and or cleaned when the enter or leave the lake.United States, Southeast Ecological Science Center. Frequently Asked Questions About Zebra Mussels. United States Geological Survey, Web. 22 Feb.2012
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Taylor Blattner
Okay, so the first thing that I noticed about your paper.. It did not meet the length requirement. But that’s not that big of a deal, it just makes it harder for to do a peer review to meet my requirements. The first thing that I like about your paper is how you tied in your own personal story. It was a cool way to open up the paper and give the reader a good insight on how you write, and what you were thinking. What I liked about your personal story that you told is how when you figured out that something wasn’t right.. you did what you could to fix that problem, basically by calling the Dupage county fisheries. That was a good thing to not, and I guarantee that not many other people would have done that. Before reading this paper I did not know what a zebra mussel was.. and after reading your paper I still don’t know much about it. I actually had to look up on google exactly what is a zebra mussel. Well overall.. I think that your paper needs some work in order to turn it in for a completed project. It did not meet all of the requirements that needed to be met. In my opinion you should have listed each topic and gone off of those and wrote a little bit about each one. That way it would have been much easier for you to come to the conclusion of all the requirements, including the length requirement. So just do some work, and im sure once you fix it up a little bit it will be a good paper in the end! Good work for now.
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Tom Rybovic
This is a very broad but well written work that describes a zebra mussel. As I kept reading on about the zebra mussel I sort of got interested in this little creature. I was hoping that I would learn a little more from the writing, which I did not. There needs to be more detailed work that talks and describes the species more in depth. This is something I have never heard about until I read this article. I did not know of such species and I am truly surprised to hear of such creature. A good idea would be to find articles that go more into depth about the specific characteristics of the zebra mussel. I think that it would make the writing significantly more interesting if you talked more about how these creatures are such a big problem. Listing and pointing out the obvious cons of these creatures being in our Community Lake and ponds would also be very helpful.
I really enjoyed reading this piece of work because of the way it was presented. I liked how you started with simple fact that you like to fish. After you got that message across, you started talking about how you like to fish the local ponds and lakes. It shows much about a character when one is involved in any kind of volunteer work for a community or charity. It is nice knowing that the writer actually has done something before for the issue that he or she is fighting for.
Overall the work was well written. More examples and more detailed work would make it much more interesting. This topic is surely hard to talk and research about knowing that it is not something that has everyone’s attention. In my opinion, for a topic like this, you have to put forward a strong point to someone that has never heard of such creature before. You want them to get interested with the things you have to say. Tell them all of the problems that they are causing and how it is affecting something in our community. Show them that it is possible to stop such things from happening.
Overall, the guidelines should lead you when writing a paper. Some of the requirement have not been met but could easily be fixed. As I said before, some of the main topics need to go more into detail. I feel as if a person that knows nothing about a zebra mussel were to read this piece of work then they would only get a rough feel for what it actually is. This needs to be worked on but is definitely off to a good start.
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Holman Zea
I had heard about invasive species in our lake I wrote a paper about the Asian carp and how it was affecting the balance of the lake. The Asian Carp feeds on a reproduce leaving native species to die of hunger or space. I also stump upon zebra mussel and how they attach to literally everything that touches the water. I had never been fishing because I despite the odor since I was a little boy. However, I can’t deny that this invasive species are a major impact in our environment. Some of our native species are in the border of been extinct. I like the fact that you are involved in this issue, and that you warned of its infestations in the lake. You stop it from spreading to other regions of the lake. This topic is something that impacts you directly and you are letting us know that it impacts us as well by this critters are affecting our water system by eating the algae that filters our water. If we don’t take care of this invasive species it would be an impact in our pockets. It will help if you add a scenario where we take care of all Zebras Mussels. What would happen? Would it be better? Give us an example of the damages that could cause if we left this untreated. You mention that it could cost the consumer money to remove the mussels because they clog up water in our pipes. What can we do about it? is this out of control ? The inspection of boats sounds like a good idea because it would stop the zebra Mussel from spreading to other regions. The best thing that I like is that you added your personal thoughts and that you are affected by this issue. I know this is a draft and you would add more facts, examples and a good organization to make this better.
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Alex Velez
After reading Chapter 4 in “Why White Rice”, I got a lot of insight as to how to start a thesis statement but there was one specific anecdote that caught my attention. Titled “thesis as an anchor and other nautical musings” by Tom Dow really struck a chord with me. Tom explains how he is “a thesis guy”, and how he evolved over time with his writing. He makes the analogy about how traditional anchor functions on a boat. “Without an anchor, it is very difficult to stay focused on one area of lake or river.” This analogy can be used for many things, but in this case he relates it to how a thesis should work. The reason why I could relate to this is because I’m a fisherman myself. He suggests “that you begin each of your supporting paragraphs with a topic sentence the further anchors your thesis. That way, you purposefully set up each section of your text in a way that makes it possible for readers to clearly understand both the main point of that paragraph, and how you have connected it to your thesis. In other words, you make your purposeful choices and connections visible for your reader.” These are solid suggestions I can use in my writing for the future, as I allow my own writing to evolve. Although I still feel I should do some free writing for my rough drafts, I believe using this technique will tie everything together in the end.
Dow,Thomas. “thesis as an anchor and other nautical musings.”Why White Rice? Thinking Through Writing.Dubuque:Kendall Hunt.2010.86-87.Print. -
Alex Velez
The article “The Village Voice,” by Peter Hessler, portrays Rajeev Goyal as an innovator, with entrepreneurial skills that get stuff done. It’s amazing how at 22 years old in a completely different country, he is able to use his know how and own skills in getting water to a town instantly, when it would usually be a three day trip. Having that much drive to do something so grand at that age, is a feat in itself. It doesn’t stop there. He is clever in trying to raise awareness and funds for the Peace Corps by going straight source in Washington. He simply starts studying a book of photographs of everyone in the house and senate and solicits politicians whenever he sees them. This “bird dog” tactic works early on for him but eventually bites him in the butt when he gets ignored by senator Patrick leahy when trying to ask for more money at an ice-cream social. I wouldn’t be lying if I told you I saw this coming but in the end his insistence did raise money for the Peace Corps. I also liked the part when he bird dogged senator Feinstein and convinced her to second guess a budget proposal that would potentially redirect finances from foreign military to the Peace Corps. Towards the end of the article Rajeev sees some negative outcomes from his water project in Namje. People in the once small and modest village are looking at opportunity to be wealthier which I don’t believe was his main intention. He believed the people of the village shouldn’t lose their sense of community. You see this in the ending paragraphs when they go back to the village to dedicate a building for agriculture learning “Rajeev gave a speech about development and the audience cheered every time he mentioned money”. He’s disturbed by this the following day when he is asking for a grant by the minister to fund the projects but instead ” tells the minister that they don’t need money they need to focus on the plot of land and move slowly.” Rajeev goyal starts out with so much energy, high spirit, and cleverness, but does it with a kind of recklessness with no forethought into the future. By the end of the article his wisdom comes into play and realizes focusing on community and seeing progress through would be the way to go in the future.
Hesser, Peter. A Reporter at Large, Village Voice, The Peace Corp’s Brightest Hope.” New York: The New Yorker.2010. 100-110 Splatter.writing101.net: The Messy Art of Writing.Web 9 Feb.2012 -
Alex Velez
who should survive?
when I made my decisions for who should survive and who should survive, I basically did some cold hard math. I categorized the “keepers” by two tiers. who would be essential for the group as a whole followed by who would be a positive influence to keep moral up in the group. our group pretty much made our decisions based off of that. exept for the girls, didn’t want to seperate the newborn and her mother but were decise in the extermination of the langs. -
Alex Velez
Dave eggers short story. “What it means when a crowd in a faraway nation takes a soldier representing your own nation, shoots him, drags him from his vehicle and then mutilates him in the dust” describes a man who is all too common in this day and age. The underlying meaning of how we have so much energy to well, do nothing when something infuriates us enough to let our thoughts boil. The man in the story is obviously restless and is waiting for life to happen to him instead of the other way around. The subject reads the article and perhaps he takes it personally that someone in another country would do this to a representative of his own. For instance, “if the soldier was killed and mutilated in his own country the man would not feel this kind of revulsion.” Eggers also mentions how the man feels like he was “punched”, “robbed”, and “violated” but in the end actions speak louder than thought. He could do other things yield his anger and maybe even spend his energy like being proactive about the situation instead of doing nothing. if it offended the man so much maybe he would join the military, send a care package overseas to our soldiers in active duty, go for a jog, something. Instead, he chills out drinking his orange juice and lets his day float by like his neighboring smoke stacks.
Eggers, Dave. How We Are Hungry, What It Means When A Crowd In A Faraway Nation Takes A Soldier Representing Your Own Nation, Shoots Him, Drags Him From His Vehicle And Then Mutilates Him In The Dust. McSweeney’s, 2004,17-18. Splatter:the messy art of writing web. 2 feg 2012-
Lee McKinnis
That seems to be a common reaction humans display in those sorts of hings. Ignoring natural things which kill more people while focusing on human/human violence disproportiontely (the book ‘Sex and War’ writes on that/does war analysis from a biological POV)
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Alex Velez
Live? Die? Kill?
I had a hard time trying to think of what I would live, die, and kill for and in the end, I could only think of all I have to be thankful for. We take a lot of things for granted, so I had to change my perspective and put myself in the position of not having anything before continuing to ask myself the first of the three questions. What would I live for? To get in the right mindset, I was thinking of how it would be if I were locked in a prison cell today, somewhere in another country looking out wondering what I might be missing in the world. I would miss friends and family of course but I would also miss so much more. I would have missed my chance to go see the Grand Canyon. I mean, come on! It’s one of those things you should check off on your bucket list right? Especially if it’s only 1,677 miles or 1day, 2 hours drive away, Actually, I’ll be flying there in June because I’ve always wanted to see it (flight time 3 hours 50 minutes). So many other places I would love to see like Europe, Mexico, and the Caribbean just to name a few. Back in my cell, and looking from the inside out, I wouldn’t have any experiences to draw upon for the future, and only ideas from my cell. I would be drawing my own theories about the world with no answers, which would truly suck. Should I invest in real-estate? Should I get a dog? Should I love my family more? Should I do more to make a difference in my life? What could I do to make my mark? What could have been if I actually did something I liked for a living? Don’t know but whether the experience is fun or not ultimately, it will be interesting to find out.
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Lee McKinnis
The scene with the niece was kind’ve cool. It reminded me of some anime series, and of course military and science-fiction series where you see one guy beginning an attack and his/her squad mates of squadron is all “I’ve got your back” and follows their friends into battle. Space battles where space fighter squadrons cover their mates and hold off the hordes of enemy fighters, or do some desperate actions to hold their positions.
Dealing with coaching high schoolers, ive done/do something similar – I judge for policy debate for chicago debate league. It’s not the same as being a coach but it’s still fun to discuss things with debaters and show them things that can be done better and whatnot. It helps that I’m still only 21 and don’t dress/act like the coaches or some of the other judges. In a way I do wish the people would do more ‘weird’ things in their debate tournements but meh debate is still fun.
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Lee McKinnis
Errm, I can’t edit my posts? This sucks. Dealing with WWII, there’s a lot of theaters which vary. After all, fighting as a US soldier in Normandy or France is going to be different then being a Soviet soldier in Stalingrad. Or being Japanese in Iwo Jima vs being a US soldier. There’s a lot of interesting things not really focused on a lot in US media (i.e. ‘Great Patriotic War’ – war between Nazi Germany and USSR, Baltic nationalists supporting Nazi Germany, Finnish Wars with USSR, second Sino-Japanese War, etc etc.). That needs to be fixed, but hay you can still look up/buy/download russian and soviet films on the subject, as well as german, and japanese and chinese and korean films!
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Steve Zea
What I like best about the essay is well your way to introduce short stories in your essay. Although you did not gave a direct response on your questions. What do you live for? What would you die for? What would you kill for? You’re focusing on the life that you live instead of trying to answer these questions. On the first essay, your introduction lacks of organization or maybe is just free writing. You mention the desire of going to the Grand Canyon and traveling the world. It seems you have the trip all plan out, even to the mileages. The introduction leads me off to wonder about more questions. The second paragraph, you mention that believe in the term live and learn. In addition, you mention about regrets. Furthermore in the essay you are narrating the events that are going in your life. You even when to your little nice to ask her for some ideas, I don’t blame you. This is a hard essay because it takes some critical thinking. I ask my girlfriend to give me some ideas. I also ask my parents and to my surprise they could not answer those three questions. Although they let me to the same answers as many people did. A lot of people would say I live for myself and the people I love. I die for my love ones and I will kill if is necessary or if you need to serve time in the army. Over all you mention more about the little things that you enjoy in life and the things that you would like to do. It seems that you need to work on this draft and be more specify about your answer. But don’t take out those small stories. Those are great example to show some values in life. Write an interested introduction with a small story and a strong thesis. Write 3 body paragraphs that show your answer; then a conclusion to finish your essay. Over all you would do great, keep writing and then put it in order and give it more words that give out your answer.
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Tom Rybovic
Overall I enjoyed your work. I really liked the part where you talk about how you believe in “live and learn”. That is a part that I wish I would have thought of to put into my paper. It really shows how one lives life. I liked how you approached your first question. What a person lives for is a very basic yet never really thought of question. You approached it in a way that made it seem as you do not want to miss out on anything in life. Your perspective on things starts when you talk about being in a cell looking out the window. The questions you have about life that would never be answered. As you ask questions that start with should I this or should I that, I feel as if you should go out and do those things. Life is too short to only ask the questions. Go out there and do those things to see how it feels and what it does to your life.
One of the most interesting things I’ve read in your story started towards the end of the second paragraph. “I unlike most people have my regrets and wish I would have done things differently growing up but in hindsight I realize it’s not too late” is the most powerful sentence in the whole story. This shows that you are not afraid of the future. No matter you past this shows that you believe it is not too late to change the way things are going. As I read on, I saw that you have much more positive outlooks on life. You state that although there are things that you regret doing, you know that there is still an opportunity waiting to right yourself.
Your third and final question seems s to be answered in a much longer and different way in which the first two questions were answered. You start by asking your niece what she would die for. Honestly in my opinion, I think that is the part you could have left out. To some extent I like it because of the sheer fact that shows us both of you are willing to give up your own lives for each other. On the other side of why I didn’t like it is because it seems like you listened to what your niece would kill for, not you. Try to take a minute to actually place yourself in a position that you would be willing to take away another humans life away. It is very hard to even imagine such a situation, for that not even talking about completing the action. I had a really hard time thinking of what I would kill for. In the end, I came up with nothing. I do not want to seem selfish, but in my opinion everyone lives for themselves. Of course, this is only my opinion that can seem completely wrong from someone else’s perspective.
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Alex Velez
when I think of what “ecoliterate” is, I kind of think of the utopian idea. nothing is wasted, everything is recycled, people coexisting and picking up the slack for others when needed. capra tries to redifine our current world with one that is polished and perfect. with human, educational, and political communities working as one organism devoloping partnerships through which these communities can coexist. one can make the argument that we are in some respects already trying to become ecoliterate i.e green jobs, green cars, green energy, and eco-tax have all been the big buzz in the last decade. driving a honda is my biggest contribution to being ecoliterate from a green prospective second is recycling which I try to do. I also try to develop partnerships at work which can make the day go faster. I like capra’s ideas but, in the real world sorry to say “greed”, not “green”, makes the world go round.
Capr, Fritjof “From the Web of Life” Web. 26 Jan 2012 -
Alex Velez
I’m into the “portfolio approach” and I can see how I probably read the syllabus 3 more times since its a bit to take in. I kinda feel pressured to start my writing as soon as possible so I can take advantage of the revision process. I can also see that a potentially useful tool on splatter are the “Splatter How-To Videos”.
I G.A.S.
Zea, 
Tom Rybovic, 
Taylor Blattner and one other person are discussing. 
Lee McKinnis, and
Lee McKinnis 4:56 pm on April 23, 2012 Permalink | Log in to Reply
so, I herd u liek forests. Corrrect. LOL, harry Pottor references – and 0.0 responses to that. Well, you used Harry Potter references – which is funny and cool. Also odd, but meh. Isn;’t Gryffindor the team full of elitists who do all sorts of sneaky things in order to win during their magic contests or whatnot? They aren’t the best people or candidates to name yourself after. Well more accurately, ot the most moral people. Then again I remember someone talking about how his son liked Darth Vader a lot, but when he “realized” that Vader was a ‘bad guy’ he became sad and emo abotu that.
You did talk and give a decenty explanation, well more of a summary of what you did while there but you should go into more details. What plants were growing in the forest? Do the forest workers tend to see people growing marijuana inthe forest a lot? Do they smell weed a lot while working out there? Encountered any dead bodies from mob hits there? Have they been hit by lightning? Mention things like that, it IS a forest. They could’ve stumbled upon parties in the woods at night just like how they have raves in the cornfields after all.
What happens with their work in the forest. Did you go there when it ewas warm, was it cloudy, was it raining? How was the forest trip. We need more informaiton – or more accurately we WANT more information of what happened when you were doing your project. Invasive species, do you mean the Mustard Plants? Or another plant? Mention that. People did not “puit that prarie for you to enjoy” as those praries were already there in existence until humans bdestroyed them via burning or whatever in order to plant crops like corn or anything else.
the subject iof working in a forest is something which is more interesting to me, so my attention is focused more than I would be on a subject which I simply do not care about. There is a difference between a prarie and a forest. Praries are steppes (plains) which mainly have tall grasses growing with a small amount of rain, arguably a semi-arid climate. the climate of the flat parts of Colorado east of the Rocky Mountains would be a good example of that, or Kansas or Nebraska. A forest is a large grouping of trees.
Lee McKinnis 5:14 pm on April 23, 2012 Permalink | Log in to Reply
Also, speed dating. Meh, at the end there are people who are unpaired for some reason. Wel thaty is what happens with relationships, or as people phrase it on the internet – relationSHITs. Things can be weird and drama-filled. And if being turned down for a pairing in a class is hard, imagine the problems with having problems with getting a date- the “lovy shy” and ‘incel’ (involuntarily celibate) people. As I believe I wrote in a past paper you can argue that some ‘incel’ people become violent due to that. Or something similar, and in some ways that is an awkward and weird argument.
Taylor Blattner 10:14 am on April 24, 2012 Permalink | Log in to Reply
I love how you included the speed dating. Not many people included that in their papers, and in my opinions i think that it makes yours much more interesting that some others. You did a good job explaining the speed dating opportunity in such a little paragraph. I like how you have your team a name. As far as i know, you are the only team that did that, but its really cool. I wish that my group I would have thought of something creative like that. I like how you mentioned the animal welfare league because that is who my group is working with for our project, so i can kind of relate to you. I like how you added in the busy schedule because as i have noticed, that is one of the biggest conflicts through out all of the groups that i have seen. My favorite thing about this paper is how you included every little detail. it made it so much easier to follow, and easier to relate to your paper more and understand what you were going through. Its cool how you added in some information about thee little red school house,because im sure that not a lot of people know much, if any at all, information about the school house. I like your opinion on why people don’t volunteer. they simply do not have time. I like your opinion, because i agree with it 100%. I thought that this was a really well written and thoroughly thought out paper. good job
Tom Rybovic 6:47 pm on April 24, 2012 Permalink | Log in to Reply
I specifically like the beginning to your paper. It seems very different from all of the other papers I have read. I like how you started with how we got to pick our groups. It is uniquely different and interesting. It was interesting about the way you described the way you felt when we had to choose groups. it seems like you really enjoyed it. It also seemed as if you got your group to do something you really like. It seems like you like nature and just anything having to do with the outdoors. I think that’s great.
As I read through your paper I found myself asking a few questions. I was curious about some of the information that was not given. It seemed that you were getting closer and close to telling us more of the details but then just never got to it and skipped to the next main point. The whole paper could have a better vibe to it if you went a little more into the details. For example just little things such as what kind of plants were you guys cutting down and such. Maybe even if possible the description of all of the surrounding at the little red school houses itself. It is mostly all good on the subject of information other than the little details.
Overall I really enjoyed reading your work because it has to do with the outdoors. I think it is great that your guys choose to work with the nature and the little red school house itself. I don’t mean to keep repeating myself although I feel like the work could have been a hundred times more enjoyable if there was more detail involved.
I really thought that you guys are closer as a group than any other team. From what I know, you guys are the only group that came up with a creative team name. I feel like that is a great example of leadership. Not only does this show leadership but also shows that you are working on this project as a group in order to get something moving. Other than being a great example of a strong team… I liked how you guys broke up your group into two. It seems like it is very effective and seems very logical. It is very true that the timing is hard to cope with considering everyone seems to always have a busy schedule to deal with. Once again I enjoyed reading your work and I think you did a great job with your team.
Zea 12:00 am on April 25, 2012 Permalink | Log in to Reply
Hey Alex, I like your essay. Good organization from begging to the end. I also notice that you when into details as much as you can. For example: “Me and Shaun would go on different days, then Jenna and Alex. Shaun and I arrived at the nature center at 10 AM on Saturday, April 14. We are told to meet up with John O’Neill was a hands-on naturalist and would be the person we would work for that day.” Not everyone mention the day and time of their arrival. I estimate it in mine. Your title could do better, I never seen a title with that doest end or it makes the reader question those three dots. Your begging is a good because you when in detail about the stuff that happens during class time. You talk about the speed dating, which was a chance to talk to some classmates. Usually in my other classes I would never make contact with other students. These have to be strange for everyone to have a couple of minutes to introduce ourselves and to talk about our strengths and weakness. Those 5 minutes were not enough for me since I could not identify my strengths or weakness. I sure learned a lot about myself in this class. I notice I was more of a leader in my group or the one who contribute most of the ideas. What’s “Gryffindor’, o wait I just Google it. Very funny, you guys got it from Harry potter. Jenna does look like a Harry Potter fan to know that. It was a wise choice to pick little red schoolhouse other groups had problems volunteering at the animal welfare organization. You did a good job given detail organization about the organization and you also gave the reader an insight view of the appearance of the organization. You also mention the issue that the organization works with and one of them is Prairie restoration. It seems that you guys work hard to get those invasive species out. So far I think your group is the one that the a lot of work by going to the prairies and working with your hands to prevent the grow of invasive species. I forgot to mention that you added some information about the people involved in this organization and that added more to the paper. Overall I enjoy reading your essay because not only you gave a good description of the organization and your personal feeling about but you told it in a narrative form. I was not bore at all when I read this. I could tell everything came from your mind and not from any web site