Lee McKinnis (57)
Kristina Marynczak (37)
Killian Noonan (36)
Melissa Castillo (32)
NikoVelazquez (27)
Shannon Ratzel (23)
Michelle Reyes (22)
Kyle Barczak (21)
Maura Bilek (21)
Susan Bayaa (21)
For my last reading journal entry I decided to respond to the the short excerpt “Write that Down” in “Why White Rice?”. This small entry in the book talks about using simple language instead of complex words. I feel that I can relate to this because I often find myself using fancy words and intelligent sounding phrases to make myself sound like I know what I am talking about. It is not like I just get a thesaurus and try to find better words to make myself sound smarter. I actually know the words I use from my own knowledge, off the top of my head. I use these words and phrases because I feel that they give me a sense of confidence when writing. For example, when I am writing and I write a good sentence and I feel that it sounds intelligent and flows nicely, I will keep it. Although, sometimes I can see that my writing becomes a tad complicated too understand, so i try to shorten it up. When I am writing I try to keep it simple, but still incorporate my nifty words so I can sound like I know what I am talking about. I do not find myself making complicated sentence structures and over the top vocabulary words. For the most part I keep it simple, yet intelligent. I found it helpful when Tom said that when your ideas become more intricate, be sure to keep your language as simple as possible. I agree with this because sometimes I get carries away with my ideas and they become so complex I do not know how to write the down on paper. All I have to do now is to remember to keep everything simple!
DeVillez, Eric R. “Write That Down!” Why White Rice?: Thinking through Writing. Dubuque, IA: Kendall Hunt Pub., 2010. 98. Print.
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Corey Thiesse
Introduction and Conclusion
An individual may be influenced or forced to participate in a service learning event throughout their life, or discuss the most meaningful things that they treasure in life. They may be compelled to write a letter to an editor in their local newspaper about the major social issues within their community, and may even go above and beyond to do ethnographic field work on such social issues. There are many things wrong in this world and some people actually want to take the initiative to help fix these problems. Some people may also think that some of these problems can never be fixed, so they do not bother to try. Well, I feel that something can be done to help fix an issue. It may not be able to be completed fully by one person, but with the help of others it can surely be done. One does not have to just focus on one social issue at hand. They can strive to participate in fixing multiple social issues. After all, the more the merrier! I have taken the little time I have to do as I have explained above in the attempt to help fix some issues I believe are a problem in this world. I have a few different social issues that are of concern to me that I have done my best in working with to help fix.
These issues consist of the violations and restrictions regarding the freedom of speech in the United States, a local issue concerning the condition of the roads around my town, and an almost never ending need for people around the world to have a decent place to live. These are not just some random issues picked out of a box by my instructor, but rather ordeals that strike me as being important. They may not be as of great important to others, but to me these are things that need to be taken care of. These issues pertain to my life more than anything else out there and that is why I have chosen them.
The social issues I have chosen to write about are all connected in one way or another. They are not, by any means, random issues I have decided to research in an attempt to bring them all together just to meet a length requirement. These issues are connected by a common bond, which is to take action. When I say “take action”, I do not mean to take action on an issue that is of no concern to you. If you are going to take action you must do so with a social issue that interests you deeply and is something you truly care about. I have completed my action of reaching out to the community and informing them about the topics that I believe are of great importance. I have done this not only by writing these essays and taking part in service learning activities, but also by participating in our “Act Out” service learning fair where we informed people about certain issues that needed to be addressed.
In this portfolio you will receive an in depth look from my point of view as to what is going on with these troubling issues in the world today. I have taken several hours out of my work week, social life, gym time, and kickboxing classes to painstakingly show you why something should be done about these issues. Not only have I written what must be done, but I have also gone to these lengths to help fix these issues. I alone am only one person who can only make a small impact in the crater of social issues that need to be dealt with throughout the world. I believe something can be done in the near future with the help of others to not only inform the people of the world as to what is going on, but to also encourage them to take action and help.
As you commence to diligently read through these issues try to ask yourself if you have done these things throughout your life, or if you ever plan on it. The ultimate goal of investigating these issues, going to service events, and writing about them is to inform people as to what is going on with these issues and what is being done to help stop them. Take time to stop and think if any of these ongoing issues affect you in anyway and encourage you to take part in helping fix them. With this being said I encourage you to go forth and read this paper with enjoyment. Do not make it seem like another chore in your busy life. Be happy reading it and take the time to appreciate the hard work and good effort that went in to making this collection of writing. I am sure you will gain some knowledge out of it, and possibly even enjoy reading it just a tad. It may not be the most interesting topics in the world in your perspective, but you will acquire useful knowledge that can be used in the future.CONCLUSION
As I hope you can see, taking action on social issues that are of concern to you is a big deal. If none of us are ever going to take action then who will? We are the future of this world and it is our responsibility to do the best we can to help out these causes. Like I said earlier, you do not have to participate or volunteer with an organization if it does not interest you. Chances are that someone else will be much more interested in that issue that you will be. By all means, do not feel that you are being pressured to do this. Only take action on a social issue of your liking and that you think you can make a difference in. The impact you have on that particular social issue may be significant, or it may be minor. It all depends on how much work and effort you put in to it. This can be related to many things in life. If you do not put in the time to really try and make a difference, then nothing will happen.
This collection of writing about service learning and social issues should give you a good idea of how to start. If you have the time and are willing to volunteer, by all means do so. Some may think it is a waste of time, but by the end of it you will feel good about yourself. I was in a position like that before I started doing research and volunteering. Although, now that I have completed my work and helped out on social issues that are of my concern, I feel a lot better about myself as a person overall. It was indeed a challenge, but definitely helped develop me as a better individual.
If you do not know where to start and are lost in this process of beginning to get involved, use my portfolio as a guide to service learning. Not everyone always knows where to start on things like this. It is a complicated process, but with hard work and dedication it can surely be done. If you have read this thoroughly, I am sure you will have a good idea of what to do and how to start doing it. You will have an uncompromising advantage over others and will likely be more successful when you participate in doing something about the social issue of your liking. You may even go the route I went and put together a portfolio of all the works that you completed and could try to reach out to others to get them interested in other social issues.
After reading all of what I have to say do you want to take action on important social issues? Do not be intimidated at all by what I have been saying. Be confident and go into the world with a new sense of kind heartedness. Be happy and do what you can to help these organizations that are dedicated to helping the social issues you care about. If you really get into this you could possibly make a career out of it for yourself. What could possibly be better than getting paid to do something you love and care for? You never know where the world will lead you. You could be so passionate about helping out with these issues that it could become a huge part of your life.
Do you not want to become a better person on the inside? Volunteering your time to help out certain causes will most definitely make you a better person. Do not be hesitant to try new things. If you need someone else to do something like this with you, then find a friend that would be willing to help out! This could be a life changing event for both of you! I strongly encourage you to try something like what I have done, because you never know where it could lead you. -
Corey Thiesse
For this weeks reading journal entry I decided to read a small passage in the book “Why White Rice?” named “Be Confident, Not a Know-It-All”. This section in the book discusses the differences between being arrogant and confident. There is undoubtedly a fine line between being confident and cocky. Many people are able to notice this line and some are not so fortunate. Being confident is a strong characteristic to have in life. This attribute can help you strive and become a very successful person. Many people love when someone has confidence. On the other hand though, many people are blinded by attempting to become too confident that they end up becoming cocky and arrogant. I agree with McGuire on this statement because it is something that runs through my mind on a daily basis. You can apply confidence in all sorts of ways, not just to writing. Having confidence can help you ask out a girl on a date, or can give you the ability to answer a question that no one dares answer (whatever question you can think of). Arrogance, on the other hand, can get you in trouble with your boss or could even keep away friends because they think you are too cocky, or a “know-it-all”. All in all, there is a very fine line to be drawn between this two characteristics, and along that line is where you will find the right balance to help better you as a person.
DeVillez, Eric R., and Michael McGuire. “Be Confident, Not a Know-It-All.” Why White Rice?: Thinking through Writing. Dubuque, IA: Kendall Hunt Pub., 2010. Print. -
Corey Thiesse
For my next reading journal entry I decided to read a short story by Michael McGuire called “Googling is Not the Same as Thinking” in the book “Why White Rice?”. I agree that many people use Google when they need to answer a quick question, but sometimes it is over utilized. We should be trying to think and testing our brains more when it comes to some of these simple things. Just because Google is the easy way to do it, and will probably provide you with the most compelling answer does not mean it should be your first choice. I like how McGuire used the example of when he asked the class what tradition meant. He asked our class the same question and a few people took out their phones to search it on some internet website – probably Google- to come up with an answer. I knew I could probably answer the question with my own knowledge, and that was probably an answer he was looking for, but I did not say it and instead, was thinking about taking out my phone to find a more sophisticated answer. I guess maybe that could be why some people use Google for simple things in life. Maybe because they know the answer to the question, but do not think it sounds smart enough, so the use Google and other search engines to find a more satisfying answer. I also agree that the libraries filled with thousands of books are not being used to their full potential, but I feel this is because the students that are in school now have been brought up in an age of technology and not like their parents were when none of them even had a digital house phone. They were forced to use the library they had not other choice. But we as students of this technological age, are brought up using computers in elementary school, so that is what we naturally gravitate towards. I do agree though, that we should become more in touch with the library again.
McGuire, Michael. “Googling Is Not the Same as Thinking.” Why White Rice?: Thinking through Writing. By Eric R. DeVillez. Dubuque, IA: Kendall Hunt Pub., 2010. 119-20. Print. -
Corey Thiesse
Habitat for Humanity: Behind the Paperwork
History behind Habitat for Humanity
To start off Habitat for Humanity is a nonprofit Christian housing organization that helps poverty stricken families that cannot afford a house. They have helped build over 500,000 affordable houses for the needy and have served over 2.5 million people worldwide. Habitat for Humanity was founded in 1976 by a man named Millard Fuller and his wife Linda. The vision for this wonderful organization is to make sure that everyone has a decent place to live. Habitat for Humanity is able to build houses for the poverty stricken people around the world by donations and volunteer work, like the kind I will be participating in. The houses they build and/or reconstruct are not mansions nor are they small shacks. These houses are decent sized living quarters where a family can be properly raised and they can live healthy. The people who are receiving the house that is being built for them also have to help work on the house just like the other volunteers. They also have to pay a down payment and monthly mortgage payments in addition to the hundreds of hours of labor. The best part about the payment plans for these houses is that all the money that the organization receives from the monthly mortgage payments goes directly back in to building more houses. It is like circle of giving that never ends.Families are selected for this organization by applying to local affiliates of Habitat for Humanity. The family section committee then chooses candidates depending on their level of need, willingness to become partners and ability to pay the loans back. The affiliates that choose who will receive the house is absolutely nondiscriminatory and also race or religion does not play a factor as to who will receive the house. The affiliates for this organization are Habitat for Humanity offices that are partners with the Habitat for Humanity International. These affiliates determine the details and aspects of how the home is going to be built and how the effort will be organized according to its local area. The main headquarters for the Habitat for Humanity organization are located in Georgia. The operational headquarters can be found in Americus, Georgia and the administrative headquarters is located in Atlanta, Georgia. There is a board of directors as well as volunteers that control the whole organization and very much care for the well being of poverty stricken people without homes.
Service Learning Details
I have made the commitment of volunteering my labor on Friday, which is the 20th of April. It is located in Lansing, Illinois and I will be donating my time and effort from 9am to 3pm. I have arranged to go with one other person from my group that has already went to one of these service learning opportunities on Friday the 13th. This will be a very new experience for me, but I am very excited for it. I have a feeling that I am going to feel good about myself for helping the poverty stricken people that cannot afford a house to live in. I feel I can bring some good handy skills to the table because I have worked on a few houses with my father, so I will not be a novice when I arrive there. Maybe this will be able to help me because instead of having to be shown how to do the work I will already know. I assume this will help save time and benefit the organization as well as the people who are having the house donated to them. Another factor that will definitely help not only me, but the organization is having my other group member there as well. This will help because she has already been to one of these, so she knows the ropes and will be able to show me, as well as other new volunteers, what to do and how to go about completing the task.
What I Hope to Learn
When I attend the service opportunity I hope to learn many new things as well as meet new people and see the inner workings of the Habitat for Humanity organization. I would like to see what kinds of people attend and volunteer for this organization. I want to know if there are any people who have already been helped and have come back to give back what they received. I hope to meet some people that are well engaged in the organization and to learn interesting facts as well as stories from past experiences building houses for the less fortunate. I also hope to learn some new valuable skills for working on a house that I could use in the future. I could use these new found skills to work on my house when it needs repair, or I could even build my own house from scratch.
My Plan of Action
When I arrive at the house I am going to be working on I am going to jump right into the action and ask what I can do to help. I am going to get to know the people I am working with so we can make it a fun and enjoyable time as well as productive. I plan to be working most of the time and trying to stay busy so the time goes by faster. Since I am a handy person I am going to take it upon myself to place myself wherever the most work or hardest work needs to be done. Of course, if I am told to do something else by a person of higher authority, I am going to listen. Whoever needs help I will be glad to offer a hand and give them pointers on how to work more efficiently. I am also going to ask one of the main people in charge if it would be alright with them if my group partner and I could interview them. When I interview them I am going to ask questions that I would not find on the Habitat for Humanity website. The questions are going to be deeper and more involved than what the basic person will want to know. I may ask something like how many people normally show up to volunteer? Or do you ever see some of the same people, or is it a different crowd every time?
What to Expect
For this service learning opportunity I plan to expect a decent amount of people all collaborating together with one goal in mind. I feel that everyone is going to be respectful and it will be a good atmosphere to work in. I am not exactly sure as to how big the house will be and what we will be doing for the particular day. I hope to meet new people and maybe even some new friends. I feel like the effort put in to building this house will be somewhat organized. I also think that when I first arrive there it will be a tad chaotic until everyone gets settled in and is able to adjust to what they should be doing. I feel like the people there will not be working very hard because of past experiences at other service learning activities. I think there will be a good amount of people working diligently and some will be slacking, kind of just taking it easy.
Day of Service
I woke up on a very rainy Friday morning, after getting almost no sleep and very much not wanting to attend this service. I pushed through my feelings though and got up to get ready for a day of work. The fact that it was raining was very aggravating to me because I figured we would be working outside at one point or another and I was not in the mood for a rain soaked day working outside in the cold. It was about a 35 minute drive to the neighborhood of Lansing, Illinois where the house was that we would be working on. When I arrived at the house I was about a half hour early, so I just sat in my car until it was time to go in. While I was waiting for the time to pass I noticed there was a car already parked in the driveway with a man sitting inside of it. I just stayed out and watched for a while to see what he would do, because I was not sure who it was. He saw me parked across the street and yelled to me to see if I was part of the Habitat for Humanity group. I responded that I was and he informed me that this was actually not the house we would be working on for the day because it was raining. We were supposed to be tearing down the siding on a garage and replacing it, but since it was raining they decided to move to another house a few blocks away. The man’s name I met was Mike and he seemed like a fairly normal guy. As we waited for the other members to get there he made us sign in on a sheet. Once everyone had arrived, Mike explained what we would be doing and where the next house was. As he was giving us the breakdown of the day another man had arrived in a pick-up truck. This man was named Dave and he seemed like he knew what he was doing. He immediately struck me as funny and outgoing. This man helped make the day very enjoyable.
Time to Work
When we arrived at the new house we walked in and met another man named Mike as well. He was getting everything ready for all of us to work. He told us that we would be painting the whole time because there was not much to do besides prime the walls before they are painted. They also did not have the tools and supplies to work on anything else, so painting it was. Before my group member and I started painting in the house we took a few pictures of what we were working on. To be honest the painting we had to do was pretty boring. The only thing that kept me entertained was talking to Shannon (my group member) the whole time. Otherwise, I would have found myself sniffing the primer. I found it very irritating that I could not keep the brush strokes even when painting the wood. It seemed to me like it looked very unprofessional. Being the perfectionist that I am with certain things that bother me, I commenced to redo all the spots that did not satisfy me. Seeing as how I am not the greatest painter, it did not turn out so well, but I congratulated myself on the good effort. We had a little change of pace when Dave asked us to move some plywood from the van to the garage. I found myself being a little better at this than painting. This task only lasted a little bit, so my glory was short lived.
Overview
Overall, I did find this service project boring, but it did open my eyes to what goes on while working on these houses. I have seen how the people operate inside Habitat for Humanity and what it takes to help build some of these homes for the less fortunate. It was a good experience to learn from and it taught me some valuable lessons about what some people will do to help people they don’t even know. It also taught me how to prime a wall fairly well! I recommend volunteering for any organization like Habitat for Humanity if you want to do the world some good.
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Corey Thiesse
For this week’s journal entry i decided to read a short story in “Why White Rice?” called “The Social Side of Research: Talking With Experts”. This story was written by our teacher, Mr. McGuire and discusses the topic of a word called “mystory”. His students were baffled by what it could mean. Many students simply googled the word and came up with virtually nothing. Before anyone researched anything he told them that it was a word made up by a University of Florida teacher named Gregory Ulmer. Now no one seemed to know how to describe this word or how to give a proper explanation of it. One of his students, however, contacted the professor for the University of Florida and got a response to his question within a few days. This is what Mr. McGuire has been wanting us to do with our research papers. He does not want us to simply just google the question and possibly find an answer. He would rather have us go straight to the source and ask the person directly what the word means. This may seem to forward to timid and shy students but it is in fact a great way to find out things quickly. Many people just do not realize how easy some things could be if we just used out minds in a more direct and straightforward way. If I was in that class i would have done the same as the others by just trying to give the definition based on what i think, or i would have googled it and based my explanation off of what i read.
McGuire, Michael. “The Social Side of Research: Talking With Experts.” Why White Rice? Thinking Through Writing. Kendall Hunt Pub, 2010. 127. Print. -
Corey Thiesse
For my next reading journal response I decided to read an article in chapter 6 of Why White Rice? called “Writing is Limitless”. This article discusses creative writing in the lives of students. One of the first things that stuck out to me was the last sentence in the first paragraph when it was stated that we should “remove the differentiations between writing and “creative” writing because the two are in fact the same”. I completely agree with this statement because whether you like to admit it or not you are always using your creativity. People do not realize this though so they think creative writing is drastically different from just writing normally. Another part of this article i agreed with is the fact that kids these days are limited by their teachers to write papers as long as they want them. The article states that kids are so used to the five paragraph system because that is what the teachers make them do. They also do not let the kids write more than they are supposed to and in the article it says that is limiting their creativity. I think when someone is able to determine how to write their paper and to what length, they are much more creative while writing. Creativity is a wonderful thing to have and no matter what you think, everyone possesses it. It makes us who we are. It helps distinguish people from others and lets our potential to be different shine.
Ismail, Basima. “Writing Is Limitless.” Kendall Hunt Publishing Company. WWR? Chapter 6. pgs 138-139 -
Corey Thiesse
For my next reading journal entry I decided to read The Cylce of Socialization by Bobby Harro. I wanted to write about this reading in particular because it talks about some things that I am really interested about and have strong feelings for. I am talking about being different. Not conforming to the normal, everyday attitudes, activities, and other things that make us blend in with the crowd. Being different is all about standing out and letting your true colors shine. I was also intrigued by the socialization theory Harro had written about. His 7 factors of socialization were quite interesting to me and seemed to make sense to me. I like how he presents them in order as to what really happens in your life. For example, when he uses the first socialization factor which talks about family. Everyone knows you acquire certain traits from your family and people close to you that you hang on to for the rest of your life. These people teach us what is morally right and wrong, what we should do and what is frowned upon. They vaguely shape us into what we are gong to be throughout life. I particularly like the phrase Harro states when he says “People who try to contradict the “norm” pay a price for their independent thinking” (Harro 2012). I believe this statement to be true. Most people are always criticized for their different thoughts that they share with the world. People do not want to embrace them because they are different. Although, I do feel this phrase refers more to the past rather than the present because this situation has gotten a lot better in the past century. However, it is still very much present, but not to such a great extent as it was in the past.
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Corey Thiesse
For my next journal entry I wanted to discuss my experience with the Share Your Soles event. Before I signed up for this event I thought it was definitely going to be lame and not a useful spending of my time. I was wrong though. This event really opened my eyes to what else is going on in the world around us and how much more some people need our basic needs for than we do. I’m sure everyone can spare a decent pair of shoes. Just imagine if everyone in the United States donated a single pair of shoes how many lives we could potentially save from disease that comes from their bare feet constantly making contact with the rugged terrain they have to trek daily. It makes you feel so much better knowing that you have given someone with no shoes a good pair that they will probably wear much longer than you would have. I was amazed when I watched the videos in the beginning of the service learning that Mona actually goes to these places that she ships the shoes to, and actually gets to meet and interact with the people that she is helping. That must really put a smile on her face and satisfaction in her heart to know what she is doing for these poor people. This service learning opportunity has given me a new outlook on what I really need and what I want.
Share Your Soles. Green Apple Sales, Inc., 2010. Web. 3 Mar. 2012 -
Corey Thiesse
Critical Reflection of Service
There has been several service learning activities available to me through this class. The one I chose to do was the Share Your Soles event. The first thing that caught my attention for this event was the catchy name. I enjoyed it even more after I found out what they actually did in this organization. Share Your Soles is an organization that collects shoes that are in good condition from people across the nation and they bring them to a huge warehouse where they sort them out and ship them to different parts of the world where they are needed. I feel like they have a really cool name for this organization and that was what really caught my attention and made me think more critically about what I would be getting myself into. After thinking for a little bit i realized that it was an organization that donates shoes to the people around the world that need them more than we do. I felt like there was also an underlying theme in the name as well. Seeing that “sole” and “soul” sound the same I came to the conclusion that by the people sharing their “soles”, they were also being kind and sharing their “souls” with the people that are in severe need of not only shoes, but love and support as well.
When I first drove up to the building and got out I saw a huge group of people about the same age as me and thought that this could become kind of interesting. I mean I did not know what to expect really. Part of my mind thought that this could be super fun and I would get satisfaction out of helping people in need and the other part of me thought how stupid and boring it would be. I was thinking that they would either put us to work like slaves and get their three full hours of work out of us, or they were going to be quite friendly and just show us the ropes and let us do our own thing. I was kind of confused at first when they started to show us videos in the beginning but then I realized they just want us to get a good grasp on what our efforts will being going towards. I understood more after I saw the short movies why so many people were touched by this organization’s efforts. You could see the happiness in the kids’ eyes and how much more energy they had once they put the shoes on. At first I was a little freaked out when Mona Purdy, the founder of Share Your Soles, was picking up the children and hugging and kissing them like they were her own kids. I realized though that after doing all this for these children she had developed a strong emotional bond with them. I know for a fact that when I walked into a poor village like the ones we saw in the video, I would not be hugging and touching these kids. It amazed me how much of her life she puts in to this cause to help these children. After seeing these movies we were finally able to get a taste of what needed to be done to help these kids.
Once we finished watching the movies we were brought into a huge warehouse filled with all types of miscellaneous shipping and packing materials. Before we could even start helping I remember Mona coming out of the main room and into the warehouse. I watched her the whole way because she seemed like a woman on a mission the way she was walking. She finally came up to where a group of people were standing, which included me, and she introduced herself. Once that happened she started rambling on about this Kony video that had gone viral over the internet. She wanted to know if anyone had heard anything about it. I did not want to raise my hand because I did not know too much about it except that it had been blowing up my news feed on FaceBook and that several people were so touched by it. There was only one kid in the group that had watched it and Mona eagerly wanted him to provide information about the video so that everyone could become aware. Right away you could tell Mona was trying to get everyone to become inspired by this video and get the urge to do something helpful. This kid was nervous and you could tell it right away. Every time he tried talking Mona would yell for more people to come over and listen to his interpretation of the video. The group grew to as big as it was when we were waiting outside the warehouse and the kid finally was able to tell what they video was about. When he finished explaining Mona was eager to get us to work. So she brought over her two assistants and had us all go work on something.
About a half hour in to helping move shoes and crates the two assistants told us that they did not really have anything for us to do. We all kind of looked around very puzzled with an odd expression on our face almost as if to say “then what are we doing here?”. Throughout the course of the three hours I had met some new people that I felt I could get along with, so I stayed with them for mostly the whole time. We were assigned to go put saran wrap around the barrels that were going to be used as drop sites for shoes in different areas across the country. That kept us occupied for a good forty-five minutes and during that time span I had managed to cut my finger on the top of the barrel. Now this was a pretty good cut, enough where I was dripping blood onto my pants. That is when I realized that there was actually a little risk in helping these people in need. Although, it was not a big risk, I still felt proud that I was working through my pain to help this great cause.
I felt like I had a lot more free time than I should have had while working there. At one point I was throwing around a football with one of the kids I met because there was not much to do. I felt like I was kind of waiting around for someone to tell me what to do because I had no idea how to help. I was out of my environment. It was not long before someone asked me to move something for them, but even when I finished with that two minute task I found myself again in the same situation waiting for things to do. So I started thinking a little more about the whole process they go though at the warehouse. I overheard Mona say something about a shoe drive where they are selling shoes. That really confused me and brought up a lot of controversy for me. I thought that this organization was all about donating the shoes they collect, not selling them for a profit! I just kept my mouth shut thinking that there was probably something I did not know about the shoe drive. I started looking around and then I noticed that in the boxes they were shipping there was not only shoes, but there were jerseys, soccer balls, cleats, dresses, footballs, water shoes, shorts and t-shirts. I was kind of surprised by this that they were not only donating shoes, but several other necessities that the less fortunate people are in need of. I thought that was pretty cool that they went the extra mile for the needy.
Overall I thought this experience was a good one where I learned a good deal about the insides of this operation. It is most definitely a great cause to work for. I would indeed recommend this to anyone who wants to help the needy people in countries all over the world including our own.-
Julian Operana
Corey T.
I like how you started the essay by saying that the title of the organization caught your attention. Also after when you said you liked it even more after you found out what the organization did for you. You went straight to the point by saying what the organization did. “ Share Your Soles is an organization that collects shoes that are in good condition from people across the nation and they bring them to a huge warehouse where they sort them out and ship them to different parts of the world where they are needed.” When you compared the soles and souls was very great because you looked at the title outside the box. “Seeing that “sole” and “soul” sound the same I came to the conclusion that by the people sharing their “soles”, they were also being kind and sharing their “souls” with the people that are in severe need of not only shoes, but love and support as well.” You then go into detail about getting there to see a huge group around the same age. “When I first drove up to the building and got out I saw a huge group of people about the same age as me and thought that this could become kind of interesting. I mean I did not know what to expect really. Part of my mind thought that this could be super fun and I would get satisfaction out of helping people in need and the other part of me thought how stupid and boring it would be.” I liked how you talked about the experience saying that the whole thing was very confusing. It was puzzling and you didn’t know what to do because they didn’t really explain it well. That is unfortunate that you cut your hands and it is very nice that you kept on working through the pain to help the great cause. “That kept us occupied for a good forty-five minutes and during that time span I had managed to cut my finger on the top of the barrel. Now this was a pretty good cut, enough where I was dripping blood onto my pants. That is when I realized that there was actually a little risk in helping these people in need. Although, it was not a big risk, I still felt proud that I was working through my pain to help this great cause.” Its also good that you want to go back after when you have your free time. It looks like it made a immediate impact in your life. It looks like you had a lot of free time because it wasn’t organized because you explained how you played football. I like how you added the detail that not only were they sending shoes but they were sending more other stuff.
I thought this was a very well written essay. I didn’t really see any grammatical issues in the essay. I thought you took your time and wrote a good essay.-
Katie Didier
Just to start off I think that your essay or reflection would really benefit from a creative, eye catching title. The title you have now is informative but I feel like you could gain a lot from a little more creativity in your title. : )
I love the personal little thought in the beginning of your essay. I am talking about the one explaining that you liked the name of the organization and then you like the organization even more when you realized what they did. I feel like this thought process is a great addition to a reflection essay. While it may not directly pertain to the exact experience it allows the reader to really get a feel that you are writing about the entire experience, not just the three hours that you volunteered. I also liked how you broke down the name of the Share Your Soles organization at the end of the paragraph as well. I didn’t think of “soul” the way you did and it was nice to see how much thought you put into the whole organization. You really did a great job highlighting the details and creating a useful reflection on it.
There was quite a contrast in the second paragraph. You said that, “Part of my mind thought that this could be super fun and I would get satisfaction out of helping people in need and the other part of me thought how stupid and boring it would be”. I feel like the difference is expectations has a pretty big gap. You did explain the different situations that could occur for each to happen however I feel like there should be a more subtle shift from one idea to the next because they are so vastly different.
I think that the best part of your reflection essay is the part where you first introduced the topic of Mona Purdy. I personally was really inspired by her and I am glad that you felt the same way. It was a great addition to your reflection paper to see your first reaction to the movies. My reaction to the movies was a little more skeptical but you seemed to get a lot out of them. I like how you commented on Mona picking up the children like they were her own. This part in particular did not faze me. I guess that I am just used to videos like these that are trying to make you feel something for these kids. However, I don’t think that was Mona’s intention as you pointed out. She really just had a strong emotional bond with the children. While you said you would walk into a village and just pick up the children was a great reminder of just how giving and attracted that Mona is. This example really helped prove your point about the founder of this great organization.
I like how you mentioned that they did not know what work they would have us do. Then we were all confused thinking “well then what are we doing here?” I felt the same way. I think it was a really good reflection in your essay.
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Kevin Flores
Hey Corey I like your paper and I really found it interesting to get your point of view on this service experience because I was actually considering to do this service learning project but decided to go to the Greater Chicago Food Depository instead. I really think this is a great organization because it shows that it only takes a couple people to make a difference as long as they are willing to help and able to give their time to dedicate to it. This organization I think is great because I have first hand experience of seeing people with out shoes in Mexico there are poor people who cannot afford shoes who cut tires from cars and wrap them around their feet with cloths. This is a very sad issue when you consider that there are people who spend a couple hindered dollars on a single pair of shoes and go through shoes like clockwork and do not even care or appreciate them as they should. Share your soles I think is a good organization based on hat I herd from class and what I read in your paper. I think that maybe one day I will try to volunteer there because it seems like it would be interesting and I would be helping to make a difference.
I also think that it is cool that they have shoe auctions and sell other stuff to raise money to help transport the shoes because I am sure that it can get very expensive. I am sure that running an organization such as this one cannot be easy and especially when they don’t receive outside funding.
I like how you wrote about your experiences that you had and how your day there went and that you had a good experience. This is good because it shows the reader a little more about the actual work that you have to do there because I am sure that what a lot of people would want to know. That was very good that you decided to do this service project because I am positive that you guys who volunteered were able to ship a ton of shoes which are going to help a lot of people thought the world. I think that this is a very good organization and a lot more people should be made aware of this place and what they do because I feel like it would attract a lot more volunteers if more people would be made aware of it. I think that is one way you can improve your paper, if you would put the ways we can get involved in this organization. I think that the reader can tell that they are a good group and are dedicated to help send shoes trough the world and would be willing to give their time to help them out. Overall this was a great paper I can tell you enjoyed volunteering there and felt good that you helped out the share your soles -
Jonte Spane
This was a very well structured paper that interested me greatly because I too participated in the same event. “There has been several service learning activities available to me through this class. The one I chose to do was the Share Your Soles event. The first thing that caught my attention for this event was the catchy name. I enjoyed it even more after I found out what they actually did in this organization.” I agree there have been many other options on community service that I haven’t chosen but I am very much exited I did the share your soles event. I also agree the name was very catchy because it makes you think why not give when u can. When I found out what the organization was really about I was ecstatic to be a part of this wonderfully put together organization. “When I first drove up to the building and got out I saw a huge group of people about the same age as me and thought that this could become kind of interesting. I mean I did not know what to expect really. Part of my mind thought that this could be super fun and I would get satisfaction out of helping people in need and the other part of me thought how stupid and boring it would be.” I too had these same questions in my head when I approach the share your soles event because it was something new and exiting for me to explore and discover. The paper was very truthfully given and I loved that there was nothing left out about your type what they think others want to here rather than what you felt. It was also very good that you kept it real in the paper because many people just try and type what they think others want to here rather than what they really feel about the topic. “After seeing these movies we were finally able to get a taste of what needed to be done to help these kids.” This quote was very enthusiastic to me because I too was very eager to get a feel of what was actually needed to be done to help these children in such great dismay. I was very much all for helping these children because I am almost certain that if any one was in the shoes of those children they would want some one to do some thing about it. Doing something about this great dismay the children are in is what the organization provided. “Before we could even start helping I remember Mona coming out of the main room and into the warehouse. I watched her the whole way because she seemed like a woman on a mission the way she was walking. She finally came up to where a group of people were standing, which included me, and she introduced herself.” I believe this quote in your paper was very relatable because I too have had a chance to meet Mona and agree she is a woman on a mission. Overall, Great job!
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Corey Thiesse
For my reading journal assignment i decided to read chapter 7 in Why White Rice. This chapter was titled Mash it Up… Gracefully, Using Sources. This chapter talks about how to site the sources in the papers you write and everything the needs ownership in the journalism world. The writer gives good examples as to how to understand why we need to cite our sources that we get from other people. At first he states the opposite that we should not have to cite our sources but then he goes in to why we should have to. This is a common writing technique and is just something i wanted to touch basis on because I was aware of it and wanted to express my views on it. He talks about how ideas can be owned and how ideas are worth several millions of dollars. He gives good examples when he talks about how ideas can be stolen from someone else and used by another person. For example, when you overhear a friend in class whisper the answer to a question and you say the answer out loud and take credit for it. Or when your friend plays a song he made up and you listen to it, but then you go and take it from him saying it is yours. These examples really opened my eyes and gave me more insight as to why we need to cite our sources and give credit where credit is due. It is way better than hearing from my teacher that I need to give some lame, boring history teacher credit for his work that I am temporarily using. This chapter really helped me understand why we need to cite sources.
Troy Swanson, “Why White Rice? thinking through writting” Chapter 7 “Mash it up…gracefully using sources”pgs163-174. Kendall Hunt. Print. -
Corey Thiesse
Letter To the Editor
Dear Editor,
I would like to inform you about a growing problem in the suburbs of Chicago. This problem would happen to be the deterioration of public streets. These streets include main roads, side streets, and even the sidewalks of these streets. A good amount of the public streets around the suburbs of Chicago are in very bad shape, to the point where they make me want to drive my car down another street to get to my destination. The streets are riddled with pot holes, loose gravel, and cracks that run for miles. Some are filled with asphalt in order to temporarily fix them, but do no good whatsoever. Public roads in ancient Rome are still intact today and that was thousands of years ago. So if those roads can stand the test of time with ancient technology, why can’t ours with modern technology? There are main roads that have lost reflectors that were once embedded in the asphalt and are now becoming driving hazards to citizens. Millions of dollars are spent on car repairs alone from insurance agencies to fix these cars that are affected by the bad conditions of roads. These streets need to be made better to stand the test of time or routinely repaired to ensure safe and comfortable driving and walking. I would deeply appreciate it if you could get this letter out to the public so the cities that are the culprits of these terrible streets can realize the damage being done and take action. Thank you for your time and consideration.-
Julian Operana
Corey Thiesse
I thought this was a good topic to write about because it is a growing problem especially in Chicago and some other places around the world. In the beginning of your essay you explained where the problems were. For example, “These streets include main roads, side streets, and even the sidewalks of these streets.” You also explained well not only where the problems were but what the problems are. “The streets are riddled with pot holes, loose gravel, and cracks that run for miles.” You also include how the state half fasts the job by using asphalt to fix it temporarily but does not fix it complete it. “Some are filled with asphalt in order to temporarily fix them, but do no good whatsoever.” I really liked the part where you compared ancient Rome’s public roads to are public roads and it did not compare. “Public roads in ancient Rome are still intact today and that was thousands of years ago. So if those roads can stand the test of time with ancient technology, why can’t ours with modern technology?” Explaining that people spend millions of dollars getting their cars fixed because of the roads might help get this thing get some serious notice. “Millions of dollars are spent on car repairs alone from insurance agencies to fix these cars that are affected by the bad conditions of roads.”
I thought the essay was clear and to the point. You wanted them to know about the growing problem of the roads in the Suburbs to Chicago and I thought you explained it well. I thought you could of gone more in depth with how they the city can manage their money so they can actually fix the roads because I think the problem with Chicago is that we are so in debt that we might not have enough money to fix the roads. That is why they use asphalt to get a quick and cheap fix. I understand where your coming from because whenever you drive in Chicago theirs pot holes everywhere and it does take a toll on your car and sometimes it causes accidents. Like you said how we spend millions of dollars on car repairs, the government also has to spend millions of dollars on road construction. So, it is still coming out of our pockets because of taxes. I don’t really see the sidewalks of the streets being filled with cracks maybe that is just where I live though. The part where you explained ancient Rome’s situation is the best part of your work because it explains how the roads back then are still good and are roads can not stay intact. Also, the question you asked after was one that would make you think on how ancient technology and modern technology are different. It is just really crazy that modern technology has done many things but they can’t find anything to make the roads stay intact. Another than that it was a good paper and it was very clear to read.
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Jonte Spane
The deterioration of public streets is a major factor in our world today because many people are damaging their vehicles due to them. “These streets include main roads, side streets, and even the sidewalks of these streets. A good amount of the public streets around the suburbs of Chicago are in very bad shape, to the point where they make me want to drive my car down another street to get to my destination. The streets are riddled with pot holes, loose gravel, and cracks that run for miles. Some are filled with asphalt in order to temporarily fix them, but do no good whatsoever. Public roads in ancient Rome are still intact today and that was thousands of years ago.” This stood out most in the letter because I too make the same judgment on certain streets I do not feel my car should be put through. City of Chicago officials should really try and fix these problems because they will only continue to worsen. To have knowledge that there are public roads in ancient Rome still in tact today should tell us the City of Chicago were being very chesp when building our road ways. The thought of driving down a road way with pot holes, loose gravel, and cracks that run for miles is heart braking because it will not only make the ride not smooth but it will upset the wallets of most people that drive through. Driving through these conditions are ridiculous because the driver will never know if they might get stuck in one of the holes and have to try and push their vehicle or if they are going to ride down a smooth road way. Road ways should be taken more serious in the City of Chicago because it will then affect those that choose to not make a difference in this concern for the city. I am willing to bet if this problem reached those city officials then they would definitely want something to be done to relieve them and their vehicles of any harm. Most people bend their rims, get flats, or get stuck. I personally have seen this happen right before my eyes many of times and as a matter of fact it happened just recently with one of my friends. My friend was making a sharp turn and could not see the pot hole in the turn so once they tried to hit their brakes it was too late because their tire had gotten blown. These type of scenarios happen all through out the year and I am sure almost everyone that drives in the city can give feedback from a behind the scenes type of view. Having a city with these type of problems is incredibly outrageous especially when the price of gas and the cost of living is so high it should make any one wander where in the world are their hard earned tax dollars going. Overall, great topic to write a letter about because something has got to be done to cure not only our vehicles but are finances.
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Katie Didier
I feel like the issue that you choose to write about was one that many people can relate to or that many people agree with. Because of this fact, I feel like your letter has a stronger chance to get published then another issue that may inform a lot of people of a new topic but may not actually concern them. I think it is great you chose to write your letter about something that so many people complain about yet do nothing to alter. In my opinion, starting on small things trying to make a difference is a great way to go. If you try to support an issue or cause like deteriorating streets versus a big issue like corruption in Illinois government you might actually make some progress. The immediate feedback of your efforts may encourage you to keep trying to make a difference and in the end I think that is what matters the most.
Your essay has a great purpose and as I mentioned a lot of people can relate to it. Since so many people can relate to it I feel like you should use that to your advantage. If so many people will agree with you then that means that the editor will get more support by publishing your letter; therefore, helping your cause. So, maybe mention the support you have or the people that agree with you in order to really help your cause get noticed by the editor.
Of all the letters I read I found your to be the most professional and persuasive. I especially loved how you thanked the editor for his or her time in the end. Many students used that in place of sincerely but the placement of yours made it seem a little bit more sincere. In addition, I feel like you had a short but very precise call to action in the end. You did not ask for much, just to inform the public about your issue. It may not seem like you asked enough of the editor but because you explained what getting your letter out there will do it makes your plan seem very thought out. However, I feel as though you should have added a sentence or two of how the public could help. If the public is going to read your letter and is actually interested in helping your cause you should make helping as accessible and as easy as possible to maximize the help to your cause.
I like your mention of the Roman streets. It was a good example of how things could be. However, I think you should add the name of a specific street that is really bad. This name will ring a bell with many people and will create a deeper commitment if it is a local street. I may be willing to help the streets of Chicago but I would be especially willing to help patch up Harlem Ave. I feel like that would be the thought of many people reading your letter.
I think you did a really great job on this assignment. I hope your letter gets published. : ) -
Kevin Flores
Hey Corey Im not in your group but I don’t think anyone else in my group did the letter to the editor. First off I really liked your topic and I totally get your point because I live in Chicago and I know what bad streets are because they surround my house and are full of pot holes and are coming apart. The city really should be able to fix this problem especially because of all the taxes that we pay I mean what is all of our money going to? It would be a big investment that the city would make because for one it would increase jobs and give some people a chance to work even if it is only for a season, and it would make the roads safer because pot holes can cause accidents when you hit one you can lose control of your car and rear end the car in front of you or hit a car on the side. In Chicago the only streets that do get fixed are usually main streets such as archer and central and sometimes Pulaski well that is at least what I notice. I think it is a good topic to bring up because a lot of people can relate to this issue even if they don’t drive because there’s nothing worse than being on the bus trying to fall asleep and then the bus goes over a pot hole trust me I would know. I really like how you brought up Rome as an example it is catchy to the reader and enforces you point of the letter and it makes a lot of sense because if you think about it how can the ancient Romans who didn’t have half the technology that we have today how were they able to make roads that are still stable today. Well I can think of one reason maybe because they didn’t have a bunch of cars and trucks running over them 24/7 but I still get your point.
I like how you chose this topic because it is an issue that the city can fix directly and can have an immediate impact I mean it isn’t the biggest issue that Chicago has but none the less it is a issue that would make the city a lot more presentable and defeat the stereotypes that this beautiful city gets from people who are not from here. There wasn’t really anything that I can find wrong with your paper. But I think if you were to throw in a statistic of how many accidents are caused by bad streets it would make this letter a lot stronger I know it would be hard to find if not impossible because there are so many accidents and its hard to determine the underlying cause of each one. But besides that your paper was strong and I can tell you obviously care about this issue which is great because many people also do. Hopefully they eventually fix the streets but I doubt it will happen anytime soon not to sound negative or anything
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Corey Thiesse
For my reading journal assignment I wanted to discuss some things about the elevator speech assignment. I did not know what to expect before I heard the speeches in class. I figured students would take many different approaches to how they presented themselves and how they talked. You did not have to be a very intelligent person to notice that almost all of us were not very strong speakers or speech givers. At least in front of a crowd of some sort, big or small. We all had our little nervousness giveaways that showed when we were up at the makeshift podium. Some would check their nails, play with their hair, switch the legs they were leaning on constantly and even repeating the word “Um”several times over. I am sure I left out several cues that gave away the speaker being nervous, but those are just a few. I felt like their were a few interesting topics. The one that stood out to me the most was the one on neighborhood violence. I liked how the person presenting it was able to hook the audience in mostly because of the emotional attachment she had to the topic when she stated that her friend was killed as a result of it. It also stood out because it was not in the same general category as most of the others were. This topic pertained to the local violence around Chicago, not just all over the country, which also caught the attention of everyone because it stuck so close to home. Besides that one there were a few other strong speeches along with the person who was presenting the speech.
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Corey Thiesse
Freedom Of Speech Outline Bill of Rights Constitution…
Freedom Of Speech Outline
- Bill of Rights, Constitution; how freedom of speech was introduced
- Changes over course of years; unclear statements
- Meanings of rights are different back then from today
Examples of People and Events
- MLK; how he fought for African Americans to be able to say what they please
- Lenny Bruce in the 60′s; comedian arrested for obscene jokes on stage
- Frank Zappa 70′s-80′s; first advocate for no censorship on music
- Dee Snyder from Twisted Sister; took censorship battles to Supreme Court
- Luther Campbell from 2 Live Crew; arrested on stage in Florida for explicit lyrics
- Censorship of lyrics on YouTube
Why Government Should Not be Able to Censor Lyrics
- Expression of personality
- Not directly stated in Constitution
- Politicians trying to protect kids from society’s wrongful ideas/words
- Children will be exposed sooner or later
- Not society’s job to worry about children and parent them
What You Can Do~
- Participate in blogs on Internet
- Join activist groups devoted to protecting F.O.S.
- Become more educated on politics
- Know the politicians you vote for, they are the ones who vote for or against bills that change freedom
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Corey Thiesse
For my journal this week I am going to discuss the problems our country is having with freedom of speech. Many people may not realize it but our government is slowly trying to take away our right to free speech. Our ancestors fought for this hundreds of years ago, so why shouldn’t we? Liberty and justice are not able to preserve themselves, they need action from the people who want to enjoy these rights. A good example of how our right to free speech is being taken away is when the government tries to censor swears on television or the internet. In my personal belief there are no such thing as “bad words”. Why should it matter what I say? I have the right as an individual to say whatever I may please. It is not my fault if people want to follow me and say what I say. I do not live to watch my mouth because it offends you.On YouTube there is an agency called Vevo that is censoring all words that remotely sound provocative, even if they are not in the four letter “bad word” group. They are obviously not entitling us to our rights. Just because the way others think offends someone does not give them the right, by any means, to take away our right to free speech and the ability to express ourselves. People of the government need to loosen up and not care so much what is on other people’s minds. Why does it make a difference if we are influencing people to be different and possibly even use these bad words? It is ultimately their choice. Influencing people’s choices is not a crime the last time I checked, The government is holding back the right to let people express themselves in the matter they choose.
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Corey Thiesse
The Right to “Not So Free Speech”
Many people have seemed to forget what rights we have as citizens of our country, the United States of America. One of these laws is freedom of speech. Many government officials and politicians say that the right to free speech is well protected and not in any type of danger in being violated. This is not the case though, the government is slowly but surely taking away our rights to speak our mind and talk freely without consequences. This is one of the original rights we fought for when our ancestors came to this country to escape from the monarchy in England. This is an issue because as citizens of this country we should be able to voice our opinions and have a say in what goes on in this country. Without freedom of speech we cannot stay a diverse country. The people will not have the choice to speak what they feel without being punished for it. This is a clear issue to every person who lives in this country. Others may think that our government is fair and lets us say what we please, but they do not know that the government is making new laws every year to restrain this right. They are simply blind to what the government is doing, and that is exactly what the government wants. I believe that we, as the people of this country, should have the absolute right to say whatever we feel. After all, we are the ones who founded this country, so we should most definitely have a say in it. Unless you do not care about expressing yourself and being able to stand up for what you believe in and express your views to the world, then you should help do something about this problem.
The desire to have freedom of speech has been around for ages. Back in ancient times Greek philosophers such as Socrates fought to be able to say what he had on his mind without being punished. This did not end with Socrates, it continued with others as a daily struggle with other Philosophers just like him, such as Plato and Aristotle, to try and fight for what they believed in. Back then, in ancient times, it was much harder for the people to fight for their freedom of speech because they did not have a type of rule or law that guaranteed them that right. The old governments simply did not allow it and did not take in to account what the people wanted. However, as time progressed, more and more people wanted to have the right to say what they wanted without being prosecuted for it. This happened when people from England wanted to escape the overwhelming rule of the monarchist government and make their own set of laws and rules in a new land. This is when the people of England came to the land west of Europe (United States) and started the first phases of The Constitution. Within this set of laws and rights there was the right to have freedom of speech. Ever since that day the people of the United States have had something to fight for and protect when it comes to defending our rights. When our ancestors first came here to America they fought for the right to be able to say what they want. Now, since it is a right of the American people, we have a reason to stand up against the government when they violate it, compared to the times when the people could only fight because it was what they believed in. Many famous people such as Martin Luther King Jr. have fought for the right to say what they please. So we should continue to carry on the legacy of others that fought for the same things, because if we do not the government will slowly go back to its old ways and take away our ability to have the right to say what we please. Take for example, in 1969 in the case of Tinker v. Des Moines when middle school and high school students wore black wristbands to show their support of a cease-fire in the Vietnam War. “It can hardly be argued,” Justice Abe Fortas wrote, “that either students or teachers shed their constitutional rights to freedom of speech or expression at the schoolhouse gate” (Jost 2012). Thankfully, the Supreme Court upheld the students’ rights of free speech and expression in this case stating that the students are fully allowed to express themselves in any way they please. A fine example of how a student’s free speech rights were not upheld is in the 1986 case of District v. Fraser (Student Expression and… 2012). In this case a student gave a speech with sexual references that the school was unhappy with and the student was punished. The Supreme Court stood by the school’s decisions and the student faced the discipline he was given. If this specific case was taking place in this time period, the outcome may have been much different. Sexual references are used everywhere these days on commercials, news papers, games and many more advertisements. It disturbs me to see how several cases like this one turn out where the student’s rights are not protected.
The official definition of freedom of speech according to the website Dictionary.com is, “the right of people to express their opinions publicly without governmental interference, subject to the laws against libel, incitement to violence or rebellion, etc”. If you read that quote you can obviously tell our government is not abiding by this law, which is one of the many that is the basis of our society. Many people of our country do not realize or do not care that our freedom of speech is being taken away. An example of the government attempting to take away our right to free speech is in an article by the Yuma Daily Sun that explains how a state legislator is attempting to enact a bill to punish school teachers for introducing swear words into the classroom. “A state legislator has introduced a bill that would punish public school teachers if they use words that violate the obscenity and profanity guidelines set forth by the Federal Communications Commission” (Price 2012). This is a ridiculous law being brought forth in my opinion. Yes, I understand that swears are, in fact, inappropriate words in some settings, but they should only be frowned upon, not enforced with disciplinary action. It is absolutely absurd that someone would propose a law like this to punish school teachers for using those swear words, even if it is on accident. One of the flaws I see with this law is how they would be able to know that a teacher actually used the word? What if a student does not like his/her teacher and attempts to tell someone of a higher authority that the teacher used a swear word when he or she did not. There is no proof for someone to know. Another point I bring up is that when swear words or words of profanity are brought up in class they are usually by the students themselves and not the teachers. The ultimate goal of this law would be to stop kids from learning swear words, which we all know is extremely difficult and practically impossible in the world we live in today. Sooner or later, the children are going to learn these words from home, television, or other friends, so there is no use in trying to stop it. I mean it is not like it is the end of the world if they use them. I for one am not offended by them as much as someone else would be. Society, after all, is the one who has brought these words into our cultures, never to be forgotten. In another story published by USA Today a 60 year old preacher is currently being imprisoned for publishing in a newspaper that the judge who handled his case “could be punished by God with curses, fever and “extreme burning” unless he changed his ways” (Imprisoned Mich. Pastor 2012). The ACLU has taken interest in this case and is trying to free the man from jail because of the fact that the state violated his right to free speech. To their knowledge it is the first time in history that the state has put a preacher in prison for saying what God could possibly do to a judge.
The problems with freedom of speech really started to go on the rise when social networking sites became available on the internet. People were able to say what they wanted until the government implemented laws to control what is said on the internet. However, the internet is capable of spreading ideas and words all over the world. This is important because just about the whole world utilizes the internet, so vulgar comments and such have created a problem because everyone is being exposed to them. A perfect example of this is how Vevo censors the music on YouTube. Just because they are swear words does not mean they should be censored. Another example is how swears are censored on television. Advertisement companies are now using special marks such as the dollar sign ($), hash marks (#), exclamation points (!), asterisks (*), percent signs (%), and many more to conceal the actual swear word, but get the message across as to what they are trying to say. Yes, these swear words are inappropriate, but that does not mean that they have to be banned from the television and internet all together. The right to free speech allows them to do this. Maybe they could put other laws in to affect that regulates who can see these commercials and advertisements for the people who do not mind seeing them.
The disintegration of our right to have freedom of speech is terrible and absolutely needs to be preserved. I have personally taken up group efforts with my friends to inform the community around us about what is going on. We mostly do this through social networking sites and blogs such as Facebook. We feel very strongly about this and want to keep everyone informed as to what is going on in the world around us concerning the freedom of speech. Overall, I think we have done a pretty good job being able to gain the support and trust of the people who read our posts. However, that is not where we stop. We also create songs as a rap group in an attempt to spread our ideas in a more sufficient way. We think that since so many of our friends are influenced by music, we use it to convey a message to the listener. We believe this works because the lyrics tend to stick in their head more so than when they hear it with a beat and rhythm, rather than when it is just read. My group of friends is a fairly rebellious one that despises the government and the actions they commit to strip away our rights as people of this country. We will continue to fight to conserve our right to the freedom of speech until we know justice has been served. It does not take a lot of people to create a movement and to be heard, even though it greatly helps, but it can also work with a small group of dedicated people. “Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed, citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has” (Margaret Mead). This is a quote that I think should inspire everyone to take action on this cause and put a stop to it. Some things you can do to help combat the dwindling of our freedom of speech is to reach out and join active groups that have the same main cause. If you really want to get involved I encourage you to join the ACLU (American Civil Liberties Union). This group of activists has been working since 1920 to preserve our freedom and rights as humans living in the United States. You can join their group by finding them on social networking sites such as Twitter, Facebook, and the Blog of Rights. To help them you can also donate you’re money and/or time to help fight for the several causes they support. The more people the better because then more people will be able to hear what you have to say. The worst thing that could happen is just letting the government intervene and walk all over the people of the United States. We cannot let this happen! Why else would we have a democracy if we do not utilize our right to free speech? How would you feel if you did not have the right to voice your opinion or speak your mind anymore? Just think of how terrible it would be going back to that. As a country we pride ourselves on being free and independent and having those special rights. What makes you think they have the right to take that away from us? They are not allowed to do this, so take a stand and fight for what is right.To Learn More:
If you would like to find out more information about the right to free speech for the American people and how to preserve it there are sites found below to help you learn more about it. These sites will give you a better, more in depth look at what goes on in our world concerning the freedom of speech.
This website above will give you a clear cut meaning of what freedom of speech is. It clarifies the definition of the right to free speech. It also clarifies what your right to freedom of speech consists of and what it does not consist of. It firmly draws the line as to what you can and cannot do in regards to past cases.
http://www.facebook.com/groups/314649491348/
Above is a link I posted to a social networking site (Facebook) that discusses the right to freedom of speech. People and members of the group post topics on here for debate to view different views of others around the world.
This is a link to a center for the protection of free expression. The Thomas Jefferson center provides several different ways to keep in touch with how we are preserving the right to free speech. You can join in on their podcasts, attend a tribute dinner, donate, and even speak freely on the site itself. They have a link to contact them at if you would like to get more in touch.
Citations
Price, Michelle L. “No Cussing in Class for Teachers, Lawmaker Says.” Yuma Daily Sun. 15 Feb 2012: n.p. SIRS Issues Researcher. Web. 21 Feb 2012.
Jost, K. (2009, June 5). Student rights. CQ Researcher, 19, 501-524. Retrieved from http://0-library.cqpress.com.library.morainevalley.edu/cqresearcher
ProQuest Staff. “At Issue: Student Expression and School Discipline.” ProQuest LLC. 2012: n.pag. SIRS Issues Researcher. Web. 21 Feb 2012.
Clemmitt, M. (2005, October 7). Academic freedom. CQ Researcher, 15, 833-856. Retrieved from http://0-library.cqpress.com.library.morainevalley.edu/cqresearcher
Writer, Ed White, Associated Press. “Imprisoned Mich. Pastor Says Free Speech Violated.”USA Today. Gannett, 21 Feb. 2012. Web. 21 Feb. 2012. .
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Katie Didier
To start off, I loved your title. It was interesting yet told me exactly what your paper was going to be about.
In your introduction you are telling the reader that the right to free speech is a valuable right and that it should be protected. You also say that the government it slowly taking away this right and that without this right we cannot stay a diverse country. I think that is a great way to open up your argument but I also think your first paragraph lacked proper citations. I feel like if you could find sources for your information it would make your paper very persuasive. I also feel like if you added examples in your introduction then your reader would be swayed even further. For example, when I read the introductory paragraph I read the part about the government taking away our right to free speech and I really wanted an example, you eventually gave one but I feel like it should be introduced sooner. I also feel like your call to action in the first paragraph is a little demanding. Perhaps you could ask in a nicer way instead of insinuating that the reader doesn’t care about what is happening if they don’t help your issue.
The part of your paper about the Supreme Court rulings were a great addition to your paper. However I wish you would have elaborated a little bit more on the cases. You sort of just gave the final judgments on the cases and the reader was left to put the pieces together. Maybe you could have a few sentences explaining the case and its importance. If you don’t have enough space or time I would suggest maybe only talking about one case in depth versus talking about two briefly.
I really liked the example that was given about the swearing on TV and in music videos. I think it is an example that everyone can relate to, to some extent. I also appreciated how you came up with an alternative solution of monitoring who could see the channel instead of just bleeping out the words.
I love the definition of freedom of speech. To me, it gives your paper real crediability and really helps to get the message across that the government really isn’t giving us the entirety of our right to free speech. I would suggest making it a part of your introduction because I felt like it was one of the strongest parts of your essay. : )
Toward the end of your essay you really talk about why we should act and why we should help fight for your cause. You even go on to tell the reader about your group of friends going against the government. However, I feel like you should list specific things that the reader can do to help your cause. Maybe you could list a few protests or ways of spreading your message.
Overall I think you have a really great essay here. The only thing I would really advise on editing would be the citations toward the beginning and the other things I have mentioned. Good Luck : ) -
Julian Operana
Corey Thiesse
The Right to “Not So Free Speech”
I thought this was a well thought out topic to write about. I honestly didn’t know that the government was slowly taking away our freedom of speech. The background information was well detailed and well written but when you said that the government is taking away our freedom of speech. Tell us why with some examples on how they are taking away our freedom of speech.. I do agree with you about where Americans should be able to voice our own opinions. It is true that without freedom we cannot stay a diverse country. I like how you said that the government is making new laws every year to take away our freedom of speech and people are blind to the fact that they are. I also think that we should do something about it. I like how you went back all the way to the time of Socrates and explained how everyone wanted freedom of speech. For example, “Back in ancient times Greek philosophers such as Socrates fought to be able to say what he had on his mind without being punished. This did not end with Socrates, it continued with others as a daily struggle with other Philosophers just like him, such as Plato and Aristotle, to try and fight for what they believed in.” I think your transition from your first paragraph to your second paragraph was very good and understandable. Your detailed second paragraph was great, probably one of the best parts of your essay. I thought this part was very true. Ever since that day the people of the United States have had something to fight for and protect when it comes to defending our rights. The people of the United States fight for rights everyday and don’t know what is right until the government explains it. I thought this was a good part of your essay because it shows that we are still fighting for rights. I think that you should explained a little more on some parts of the essay but for the most part it was pretty well detailed. “My group of friends is a fairly rebellious one that despises the government and the actions they commit to strip away our rights as people of this country. We will continue to fight to conserve our right to the freedom of speech until we know justice has been served. It does not take a lot of people to create a movement and to be heard, even though it greatly helps, but it can also work with a small group of dedicated people.” I like how you put something personal in this essay and showed some points of view from your perspective. Furthermore, I didn’t know that there was a face book page about this topic. I went to the first website you put up and I found it very informational. Other than that I thought it was a very good paper and I thought you did a very good job on something you obviously care about.
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Jonte Spane
I believe this is a great paper and topic chosen to express your thoughts about the government. “Many people have seemed to forget what rights we have as citizens of our country, the United States of America. One of these laws is freedom of speech. Many government officials and politicians say that the right to free speech is well protected and not in any type of danger in being violated. This is not the case though, the government is slowly but surely taking away our rights to speak our mind and talk freely without consequences. This is one of the original rights we fought for when our ancestors came to this country to escape from the monarchy in England.” This quote was taken from the beginning of the paper because it really caught my attention and desire to read more in depth about the topic. The decision you made to have the title, “Not So Free Speech”, was a great decision because I agree with that line and know that even though the United States is considered a free country, there are many factors that aren’t so free. “The problems with freedom of speech really started to go on the rise when social networking sites became available on the internet. People were able to say what they wanted until the government implemented laws to control what is said on the internet. However, the internet is capable of spreading ideas and words all over the world. This is important because just about the whole world utilizes the internet, so vulgar comments and such have created a problem because everyone is being exposed to them. A perfect example of this is how the music is censored on YouTube. Just because they are swear words does not mean they should be censored. Another example is how swears are censored on television.” This was the next quote that caught my attention greatly because I always believed the internet played a huge role in freedom of speech. “The disintegration of our right to have freedom of speech is terrible and absolutely needs to be preserved. I have personally taken up group efforts with my friends to inform the community around us about what is going on. We mostly do this through social networking sites and blogs such as Facebook. We feel very strongly about this and want to keep everyone informed as to what is going on in the world around us concerning the freedom of speech. Overall, I think we have done a pretty good job being able to gain the support and trust of the people who read our posts.” This few lines from your paper were very informative of the fact that we humans need the preservation of our right to freedom of speech no matter what the situation there shouldn’t be any law not allowing that right. It also helped me understand the meaning of your paper a lot better. I overall loved the paper greatly and do believe that you and I are not the only people in America that feels this way about are so called free country.
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Corey Thiesse
Before coming to the last class where we talked about the difference between activism and service, I did not know the basic definitions of the two words, but did not know how to separate them. To me it felt they are almost the same thing. I kind of still feel that way, but now I feel I have a better grasp on the differences between them .In a way, they are almost the same thing. They both consist of having to do something to help someone or something. I think service is a more basic word than activism. I say this because service, in my opinion is a very general term. It can comprise of cutting someone’s lawn, cleaning their pool, or doing their laundry. It could even mean doing things for yourself. It does not necessarily always have to be for someone else. Service can be used for almost anything that is an act of doing. On the other hand, activism is doing a service or a job for a greater cause. For example, going to Africa to help build schools or something along the lines of what Rajeev did. Though, there is a hazy part in the middle of these two words. When I think about the differences of these words, I also thing about what they have in common. It is almost like my brain is drawing out a Venn diagram between these two terms. I think service can fall under activism as well because doing a service is also a form of activism and vice versa. I just think activism typically tends to be on a bigger scale.
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Corey Thiesse
After watching the movie in class today with Noam Chomsky I wanted to express my views on resistance. I feel that Chomsky was correct when he was talking about resistance because people are oppressed every day and they do not realize it. Just because it is not brought to their attention does not mean that they should not have right to know. Resistance is usually labeled as a bad thing, but it really is not. The people that believe in resistance are fighting for what they believe in, and the government tries to limit it. they should not be able to limit things like that becase, after all, that is what our ancestors came here for in the first place. Freedom! They see resistance as a threat to their way of operating. It is not necessarily a threat, but more of a way for the people to let the government know we do not like what they are doing. Whenever people think of resistance they think violence even though it does not have to always resort to that if they just listen to us in the first place. I consider myself as an individual who likes to resist the norm and go against the grain. I enjoy being different. The fact of the matter is that no one notices resistance until it gets violent. The people that take part in resisting, start off in a mild manner and progressively get more violent when they do not get what they are asking for.
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Corey Thiesse
After reading “A Reporter at Large, Village Voice, The Peace Corps Brightest Hope” I am very touched by the amount of effort Rajeev put into helping the people in Nepal. He went to great efforts to do everything he could to help the people that needed the help the most. I find it amazing how much money he was able to raise and the time he spent collaborating with others to raise money and complete projects to better the community. What really stood out to me was how he took the time out of his super busy life and stood outside of his college on the weekends to sell woven hats.”On weekends, Rajeev stood on Houston Street and sold hats. It was near the law school, and he often saw students and professors, who said, “Rajeev, what the hell are you doing?” (Hessler 7). The hats were made in Nepal and shipped to his apartment in New York. Also, I was surprised at how many senators and people of high ranking political positions he was determined to meet to help fund his cause.To me it’s hard to fathom how much time and effort he put in the make sure he got what he wanted. He obviously has a great passion for helping people in need and being a part of the Peace Corps. I find it crazy that he raised so much money practically single handedly to build schools and create a practical way of having fresh water at all times. He is definitely an influential individual for people who want to do the same as he did. This story reminds me of what we talked about in class on Monday of how people think some things are too hard to accomplish so they never even start them. Rajeev is a perfect example of someone who is motivated and determined to help the poor people of the world to have a better life.
Hessler, Peter. “A Reporter at Large, Village Voice, The Peace Corps’s Brightest Hope.” The New Yorker. 2010. pgs 101-109. splatter.writing101.net-
Kristina Marynczak
I totally agree with you! And the best part is the people in the Peace Corps don’t get paid even a dollar for their work!
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Corey Thiesse
More props to them! :)
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Corey Thiesse
For the “Who Will Survive?” activity I had many different thoughts about who should live and die. I did not exactly approach this with a sense of emergency as I would if i was actually in the shelter with them. I made my choices on who should live and die on mostly whoever was the most healthy and could statistically survive the longest.I chose Mrs. Hernandaz, Jean Hernandaz, Mr. Young, and Dr. Garcia to die because they seemed to me like they had the smallest chances of survival. After participating in the class discussion about this activity I was brought to light about some different ways of looking at this situation. I saw different approaches people took to see who would live and die, such as how good of an education the person has and how it could be useful in rebuilding a human population. There were many different choices people made about who should live and die, but they all made sense in one way or another. In class there was a lot of arguing about what people’s opinions were and why they chose them. Several people were called out on their actions because many did not agree with the people they chose to survive. This caused a lot of chaos in the room and tensions started to run high. I would assume that this would be intensified greatly if we were all in the same situation, but in real life. Everyone’s answers depended on their moral values and what they believe is the right thing to do, so no one should be criticized for their views on this activity.
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Corey Thiesse
The first Dave Eggers story is discussing how a man feels about when a soldier from his own country is dragged out of his car, killed, and his body is mutilated. This event takes place in another country besides his own. For this reason he feels deeply distraught and sickened. He feels that he wouldn’t be feeling this way if something like that had happened in his won country. But for some reason he feels terrible because it happened in a foreign country. I think this is because he feels that he hears about things like this on a daily basis in his home country, but when he hears about one of his native soldiers being absolutely desecrated in another country it strikes severe emotion inside of him. This may be because it is unnatural for him to hear this since it doesn’t happen very often, so it caught his attention. But when it happens in his own country he almost turns a blind eye to it as if he is used to the feeling and it doesn’t seem to bother him as much anymore. For the second Dave Eggers story I was a little confused about it too be honest. To me it was very funny a few times when Eggers refers to the sexual actions that the father was attempting to describe but kept stopping because he did not want to offend the listener, which in my opinion was his son or daughter. Also, i noticed that when the father was telling the stories of how he and his mother changed the world he was incorporating historical events that had happened over time. On the other hand, I was a little thrown off because there also seemed to me like there was a little bit of fictional story telling involved. For example, “We increased average life expectancy to 164, made it illegal to manufacture or wear Cosby sweaters, and made penises better looking–more streamlined, better coloring, and less hair” (Eggers). Obviously, it is quite impossible to do that nowadays, but maybe sometime in the future we will be able to accomplish those types of things. This story had me guessing the whole time about what Eggers could be referring to with all these crazy things he was describing to us. One thing is for sure though, he definitely kept me interested!
“We increased average life expectancy to 164, made it illegal to manufacture or wear Cosby sweaters, and made penises better looking–more streamlined, better coloring, and less hair” (Eggers). -
Corey Thiesse
Live, Kill, Die
When I am asked the three questions, what would I live for, die for and kill for; I begin to think about the people and things that I deeply care about. These include my family, friends, pets, memorable items, and ideas and concepts that I truly believe in. These mean the most in my life because they have been a great influential factor on my mind and heart. My family has always been there for me and always will be. I have a few handfuls of friends that I know I can trust. I have a few that I trust so much that I tell them things I would normally not tell my family. (More …)
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Julian Operana
Writer’s Workshop Guide
Corey T.
Phrases that stood out for me was that you said in your first paragraph “These mean the most in my life because they have been a great influential factor on my mind and heart.” It shows that your family, friends, pets, memorable items, and ideas have a huge influence on not only what you do but what you love in life. Caring about your family is one of the most important things in life and I saw that you touched on it in the first couple sentences. I liked how you talked about the government and went into full detail why you think the government is corrupt. I think people use that “I would kill for that” line sarcastically and I do understand where your coming from by saying people need to take it seriously. It is overused and maybe people just need to choose their words more wisely. I strongly agree with what you would kill for. Understanding a situation is key in our everyday lives. Saving someone close to you Saying that “I do not think that I could ever kill for anything, but rather kill for someone is a very good phrase. The third question you answered was what would you die for and I thought you answered it pretty good. From what I read it looks like you would purely die for the greater good. You would die so that it would help a lot of people in the world. I found that you would die for an idea or for a belief very interesting. You explained it well with “I would die for the idea of complete freedom within a nation. I would die for that because I believe it is something that is worth fighting for. I mean we have fought for things similar to that hundreds of years ago so why not continue to do it.” Not only did you say you would die for a idea or a belief you also explained it with great detail. The piece in a whole was very good in general. I think the main meaning was that you would live for your family, kill for your family, and die for the greater good. It looks like you have a lot of hate towards the government. I think your government paragraph was the strongest part of your essay. “I would also have my name and existence remembered forever and that would mean a great deal to me.” Saying that you want to be remembered for your existence is humble of you to say. I respect that you want to be remembered for who you were. I thought the essay was well organized. There was no obvious grammatical errors. I saw that you wrote in a first person point of view. I thought you answered the essay question with great detail. There is no extreme changes that I would make to this essay. I thought this was a well designed and well structured essay.
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Katie Didier
I like how you were direct in your opening paragraph and stuck to the main point of the writing which was to explain what you live for. However, I feel like you need more of a transition from the first paragraph to the second paragraph. I was a little confused and thought I missed a sentence and I had to continue reading for a while to understand where you were coming from.
I also really liked the point in your essay where you mentioned that the things that you live for are the things and the people that have an influence in your life and that help shape you. I especially liked that you said that they had an influence on “my mind and heart”. This really helped get the meaning across. It made me feel like you had really thought about the question at hand and took the time to carefully word your answer to say what you really meant. The wording made it seem even more personal than it already was and it definitely added to the overall essay and it was a great introduction.
Based off of the second paragraph I can tell that you are really passionate about what you are talking about. The writing flows really well and it seems like you know a lot about what you are talking about. I feel like I would be more prepared if you mentioned it in the introductory paragraph.
I really appreciate that you discussed the meaning of “what I would kill for”. It lets the reader know that you take life seriously and value the meaning in what you say. The way you broke down to the extent you would kill somebody or kill for somebody said a lot about who you are and how much you truly care for your family. I also appreciated the point that you mentioned that you also need to defend yourself and that you need to be willing to fight for yourself.
I also was a little confused when you said that you would die for an item. You specifically mentioned that you would die for a time machine. I think I understand that you mean to get the idea across that you would die for something that could potentially have a lot of importance to the world or that you would die for something that would be able to preserve your name. However, this idea seems vague to me and I think that readers would appreciate a little more description and meaning to this idea of dying for an item.
When you said that you would die for the freedom of a nation I think that your point and your intent was explained very thoroughly and passionately. I think this was portrayed by your vocabulary and maybe a little of your bold wording.
Overall I got the impression that you live to inform people about the corruption in the government and that you also live for your friends and family. -
Jonte Spane
I agree with your intro completely. My family and friends mean so much for me and they know that can count on me to do anything for them. I know they would be there for me no matter what. Having friends that you can trust is so hard to come by these days and that is nice to know you have people that are there for you. I too have very little friends that I can truly call my “true friends” and I know they would also always be there for me. You seem to know a lot about our government and more people in our world should be educated on what is going on around us. I agree with you that the government reaps us of our money. It is hard enough to find a job nowadays that pays minimum wage. “Sure some of these laws do not affect everyone directly, but what the people are not seeing is that we have a right to freedom, no matter what that freedom is! For the people like me who do realize what is going on, we don’t have enough power as a single person to make our voice be heard to stop the government’s slow but sure destruction of our once free country.” Freedom is very important! Freedom is apart of life and everyone has the right to have it. If you do not have freedom you might as well be in jail. I admire the fact that you care so much about our government and its sad at what is becoming to today! Now that president Barrack Obama is in office hopefully he can make things become a lot better for our nation. “It seems to me that the phrase “I would kill for that!” is never taken seriously, and I can see why. I guarantee if you went up to someone when you heard them repeat that phrase and asked them if they would really kill for it, they would almost all the time say no.” People always do not really take the term “ I would kill for that” seriously. It is always used in a sarcastic manner. I agree with you that I would kill for my mother. I would also kill for my father and brother. These people mean a great deal to me so of course we would want the best for them. You brought up a great point that I didn’t think about which was killing for yourself. That is a given but I just didn’t think of it that way. I found it very interesting that you would die for simply a belief or item that would change the world for the best of us. I can see that you are a very devoted person and you are extremely serious about having a positive change in the world. This writing is in first person. The writing was very technical and well organized. I believe your generalizations were very appropriate for the subject.
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Corey Thiesse
I believe ecological literacy is the understanding of what is going on in the environmental world around you. It means being in touch with nature and knowing what is happening around your community with the environment. For example, you can become ecologically literate by knowing what kind of trees are in your neighborhood. This example is one of many that will help you on your path to becoming ecologically literate. Other ways of becoming ecologically literate are knowing what kinds of insects and animals are around your community, what type of climate you inhabit, and smaller things such as what kind of grass is in your lawn. In my opinion, i think that i am ecologically literate because I feel that I know a good deal of information in regards to my community’s environment. For example, I know what kinds of trees are planted around my city and I know the majority of the insects and animals that live here. I feel that I could become more literate in the ecology field because I don’t know everything there is to know about my environment. After reading “The Web of Life” article, it opened my eyes to how the economy and ecology, and human communities and ecosystems are alike. What I took out of this article is that we can learn how to follow and create principles that will sustain a human community by studying and utilizing the same concepts as the ecosystems we inhabit.”We can formulate a set of principles of organization that may be identified as the basic principles of ecology and use them as guidelines to build sustainable human communities” (Capra). I believe this idea is a well thought out one and should be put to use because if has worked in ecosystems on Earth for millions of years i think it could do some could for our future generations.
Capra, Fritjof. “From The Web of Life.” splatter.writing101.net. Web. 26 Jan 2012-
Prof McGuire
Your citation needs some attention, and you put it in the “tag” field instead of the “citation” field.
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Corey Thiesse
is it correct now? and what is the “tag” field for anyways?
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Katie Didier, 
Justyna Matyjaszczyk, 
Julian Operana and 2 others are discussing. 
Jonte Spane, 
Kevin Flores and one other person are discussing. 
Corey Thiesse, and 
Kristina Marynczak are discussing. 
Shannon Ratzel 12:07 am on April 16, 2012 Permalink | Log in to Reply
:)
Jonte Spane 11:22 pm on April 22, 2012 Permalink | Log in to Reply
I had a very great time reading the paper you developed and believe it was very much a lesson learned. When I saw the writer was doing there service/ learning at a nonprofit Christian housing organization I thought it was wise because I too am a Christian. Being a Christian has been the backbone as to why I do services and believe I learn from each and every time. The paper that was presented was very well worded and had great rising points. There was a very high level of communication used and showed great maturity. The writer seems to be a very nice individual who is all for the action to help others. The Service that the writer provided was very religious and considerate. The Habitat for Humanity Organization was indeed a successful choice for the writer to be able to have showed what great experiences they learned. The writer had a great deal of ingredients on what their group’s goal was while typing the paper. There was much evidence of what surprised the writer while performing there service at the Habitat for Humanity Organization. There was a good lesson learned from the experience the writer had and too a great service given by them. The intriguing events that occurred while the writer was going about there service at the Habitat for Humanity Organization were well placed in the draft. The writer also had no trouble including what really disturbed them and I loved that because the writer was being real with the reader. “I have made the commitment of volunteering my labor on Friday, which is the 20th of April. It is located in Lansing, Illinois and I will be donating my time and effort from 9am to 3pm. I have arranged to go with one other person from my group that has already went to one of these service learning opportunities on Friday the 13th. This will be a very new experience for me, but I am very excited for it. I have a feeling that I am going to feel good about myself for helping the poverty stricken people that cannot afford a house to live in. I feel I can bring some good handy skills to the table because I have worked on a few houses with my father, so I will not be a novice when I arrive there. Maybe this will be able to help me because instead of having to be shown how to do the work I will already know. I assume this will help save time and benefit the organization as well as the people who are having the house donated to them. Another factor that will definitely help not only me, but the organization is having my other group member there as well. This will help because she has already been to one of these, so she knows the ropes and will be able to show me, as well as other new volunteers, what to do and how to go about completing the task.” This quote showed how well the writer overall thought about the project. It also showed when the writer plans to make their contribution to their group. I enjoyed reading the draft because I too have done many services and learned a lot from them. The fact that the writer tells about other things the Habitat for Humanity Organization offers is great because it shows that they are trying there best as an incorporation to be as diverse as possible to helping the needs of all man kind.
Julian Operana 7:21 pm on April 23, 2012 Permalink | Log in to Reply
Corey T.
I liked how you started talking about the history of the organization. That really helped me know about what you were doing your service on. I also saw that you put the statistics of the organization and said that they served over 2.5 million people worldwide. I also liked that you showed how families were selected for the organization. “The family section committee then chooses candidates depending on their level of need, willingness to become partners and ability to pay the loans back.” I also noticed that you separated the paper by sections from history, what you hope to learn to your plan of action and your overview. With the service learning details, I saw that you went from 9am to 3pm which is above the required amount of time you need to go which I thought was nice of you. You also explain how you worked on houses with your father which may help you with organization. It shows that you have some experience with houses and you gave a personal view on how it can help you do the task in the organization. “Another factor that will definitely help not only me, but the organization is having my other group member there as well. This will help because she has already been to one of these, so she knows the ropes and will be able to show me, as well as other new volunteers, what to do and how to go about completing the task.” You showed all the views on how you will have an advantage before going there. I like how you put a section on what you hoped to learn from the organization, which I thought was a good thing. It looked like the main part of what you wanted to learn is about the people who worked there. You had a completely different plan of action then I did. You wrote “ When I arrive at the house I am going to be working on I am going to jump right into the action and ask what I can do to help. I am going to get to know the people I am working with so we can make it a fun and enjoyable time as well as productive. I plan to be working most of the time and trying to stay busy so the time goes by faster. Since I am a handy person I am going to take it upon myself to place myself wherever the most work or hardest work needs to be done.” While I thought I was just going to cruise by the 4 hours and not do much. I thought I would just maybe get a easy job to do because I really did not want to do any service working. I’m glad you wanted to do it though. I liked how you talked about the morning of the service. I thought you explained what you did at the service extremely well. Everything in the paper was good and I did not see any major grammatical errors.
Justyna Matyjaszczyk 9:03 pm on April 23, 2012 Permalink | Log in to Reply
I would like to start of with the organization in which you and your team chose, Habitat for Humanity. As soon as I began reading your essay I was hooked because I have never heard of this organization. Habitat for Humanity builds home for families who are in financial need of assistance and have build and helped over 2.5 million people and built over 500,00 homes since 1976. This is an amazing accomplishment. What I truly love about this organization is they don’t just give these homes away to anyone off the street. They help people who honestly need help and are willing to work and put in all the efforts they need to in order have a safe and comfortable roof over their heads. The organization has a specific method in choosing that is eligible for this homes and it seems like they may have these people sign a contract. The reason I think this is you mentioned they must make a down payment on the mortgage, make monthly payments and the organization offers them a job. I think that is amazing because it allows the people to help out others who are in the same situation as they have been. Just as the saying goes, you scratch my back and I’ll scratch yours. I am taken back by Habitat for Humanity because I did not know there were organizations out there that provide such services. They help you get back on your feet by offering you a home and work. The work they give is to help others and yet you still have your pride and dignity because you must pay your bills. I hope to hear all about your experience at this organization and I hope it is more than you expected. I know it is hard to put faith in some organizations and be disappointed with the volunteer’s lack of efforts. When I go to a place I also hold high hopes. I hope the people of the organization are well educated and have a great understanding of the organization; they are nice, respectful and grateful people. I also hope the volunteers helping the day I do are there to work and put in all their efforts so that the organization can all the help and more from the hours spent their. I think you have a pretty good sense of what to expect the day you volunteer because one of your teammates has been there before. You have an advantage most people may not have and that is you mentioned you worked with your father on house before. I hope you tell them you did this because you may end up getting a really cool task. I like the questions you have set up for the organizations. I like them because they are not what you already read in the pamphlets. This will help better understand the organization and give this project a personal and emotional meaning. Seems like that is what you are going for. I enjoyed reading about your project, expectations and your willingness to learn and help families in need. Best of Luck.
Katie Didier 11:14 am on April 24, 2012 Permalink | Log in to Reply
To start off, I really like your title. It is very informative, yet it has a creative edge to it that makes me want to read the rest of your paper. In addition, your introduction was full of great details and I can tell that you actually took the time to interview the people involved in your organization. Many of the papers that I have read thus far were only opinion based which makes me appreciate the facts in your introduction paragraph even more. While I really enjoyed your introduction paragraph and all of the details and the great vocabularly I would advise that you add a few transitions or a catchy first sentence. However, I do not think that this is a very important thing to add because of the creativeness of your title.
There were a few minor grammatically errors and a few tense errors but not of them really stood out enough to take away from your paper too much. If you read your paper aloud to yourself I am sure that you will easily be able to spot them and fix them without a problem.
I really liked how you talked about the original headquarters in Georgia and the administrative headquarters which is also in Georgia. It helps me understand that there is a large history surrounding this topic. Because of this information I also feel like the organization is more reliable and accountable based off of its history. Many of the other services that I have read about because of this project did not a such a prestigious background and I am sure that Habitat for Humanity is very pleased that you put their credentials in your paper for everyone. I look forward to seeing your poster board at the fair!
I liked how you had a section devoted to before you visited. In the part where you are talking about how you have not visited the site yet I really liked that you added a separate section titled “what I hope to learn”. I can also relate to have a difficult time doing this project given the time constraint. Many of our classmates have also had trouble with their service groups and organizing a day that everyone could attend. However a larger problem, it seems to me, is finding an organization that is ready to take volunteers so quickly.
I enjoyed the part about when you first arrived at the house in Lansing. I feel like it is a great narrative however, I think that to make it even better you should add a few details that really describe your surroundings and create a picture for the reader. Maybe you could add a few details on the shape and on the condition of the house that you showed up and were originally going to work on. Or you could describe the neighborhood that you were in. I am really interested in your topic and I would love to know more details about the on-site volunteering.